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male
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anonymous
writes: Hi,I've known this girl for a bit now and we hit it off as good friends straight away. We both really enjoyed each others company and often spent most of our nights out dancing, drinking and enjoying ourselves. She has a long term boyfriend but I've always felt strongly for her but never acted on it, as I'm not usually the type to tread on another man's toes.Anyway one night we were out and having a good night together with our friends and I told her I liked her, we both laughed about it and carried on being friends, the fact she now knew didn't change the way we were with each other.Anyway a while after that, when her and her boyfriend were in a short break, one thing led to another and we spent a few nights together. It was very brief and it ended badly, our friendship changed for the worst, she stated that nothing between us again, and that she was returning to her boyfriend. That was pretty much where we drifted apart.However recently we have pretty much returned to the way we once were, chatting, dancing and generally having a good time when together. It's like nothing ever happened almost. Anyway on a recent night out I ended up kissing another girl in a drunken state in front of her, thinking that it wouldn't matter, but this angered her, and she then ignored me for the rest of the night and turned her attention from me to pretty much any other guy around her.I didn't do it as a way of getting back to her, I'm not like that, just a drunken fool enjoying himself. What does her reaction mean? Was I out of order? All our mutual friends noticed her reaction and change of behaviour too, and were just as confused.I do still like her but have resided to the fact that I need to find someone of my own.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2008): She may of felt offended that you kissed another girl in front of her drunk or not as she feels she has some posession over you as your friend....and sort of girlfriend.....sounds like she likes you, but is fickle as she is going between you and her long time boyfriend.
She sounds like she wants the security of having a boyfriend and the freedom to be single at the same time. She doesn't sound serious about anything at this point in her life and you aren't serious enough about her to ask her to date only you....so what do you expect? More of the same silly games.
I wouldn't obsess over her reaciton, it is what it is, jealousy and posession, doesn't really mean she loves you, but she is selfish for sure.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (21 November 2008):
She likes you being there as her loving lovely puppy. Who will cuddle her and tell her she's beautiful and make her feel wanted.
It doesn't matter if you don't mean to give out these signals, you will do and that feeling of being wanted is like crack cocaine to us girls.
So she is jealous if that attention and affection transfers from her to someone else.
She doesn't want to be with you but she doesn't want you to be with anyone else. It's selfish and she'll look bad, but it's how we can be. As you say, it's her that she is making look bad.
Ignore her and continue to move on.
Good Luck!! xx
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