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What do I do about this woman who keeps trying to touch me?

Tagged as: Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 September 2012) 2 Answers - (Newest, 23 September 2012)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

All responses will be helpful, thanks in advanced. Firstly I'm lesbian. I'm a very quiet person regarding my personal life, as to whom I'm dating and am I gay. Reason being, I once disclosed my orientation at a previous job and the outcome was bitter sweet. Sweet part was a lot of women were interested and curious about me in a flirt with me or u interested in a 3some kind of way. The bitter was those females who automatically assumed just bc I'm lesbian I want them so they acted rude towards me. The most sour part was the chick latched on to me emotionally and I let her down n she abhorred me for that, she did a lot of get back shit which eventually lead to her physically attacking me and us both being terminated.

So now I tell no one of my personal life choices at work bc I don't want a repeat of the same.

I work in a fine dining restaurant. Not five months ago this 34 year old lady was hired to work in the same job category as I. Being lesbian, I sensed right off she was lesbian. I don't think she's out bc she claims to have a husband. Newayz she had not even complete her week of training and was asking me am I family (gay lingo for am I gay). Of course I acted like I wasn't aware of the term. She then said well sense u don't know what it means then ur obviously not family. So I thought yea now I won't be questioned anymore.

Recently I just begin working another shift, the shift she's on. And it never fails, each time I work with her she always find a inconspicuous way to have a reason to touch my body. I can't tell u how many times she's touch my ass in one shift. Newayzs I still acted unaware and we were alone again so she asked me again am I family. N I acted the same as before, then she said let me just ask u, are u gay. And I told her no. But she still continued finding reasons to touch me til the end of her shift.

I'm not sure how to handle this situation bc I really don't want the attention, I'm not offended by it but I would rather my business be my business. And besides this chic claims she is married so why do I matter, y touch me. I'm not a macho, aggressive, or stub lesbian, i'm feminine.

View related questions: at work, flirt, I work with, lesbian, threesome

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A female reader, fishdish United States +, writes (23 September 2012):

fishdish agony auntthis is sexual harassment, doesn't matter if she's female, she's violating your privacy. You don't have to come out to your boss or HR, you don't even have to say she keeps asking me if I'm attracted to women, your sexuality doesn't have to even come into play- you can say you've been touched by her countless times. if you think management isn't going to follow up or give her the benefit of the doubt you could try recording these interactions somehow. Or better yet, ask them to review the security footage if they have any. I can tell you're a nonconfrontational, no drama kind of person, but when it comes to your body, you need to speak up for yourself, you deserve to have your personal space, and not be touched, regardless of your sexuality. Report her.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2012):

The answer is simple to this question , that no matter what she does not have the right to be touching you up. And the only way she will stop is if you say politely and in a matter of fact way, please refrain from touching my body. This will continue until you put a stop,to it.

Take care

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