A
male
age
26-29,
*astx
writes:Hey Guys, I'm in a bit of a icky situation and I would love to find a way to successfully reconcile with my ex girlfriend. Anyway this girl has been my best-friend for 4 years and a lover for just over 2 years and the reason why we broke up was that there was no 'spark' left, at times i would feel insecure, and that she did not feel the intense/sexual attraction for me anymore. After the breakup, I remained contact with her, but I realized that I'm only hurting myself. I don't want to make her perceive me as needy, clingy or desperate. So I told her to never contact me unless she would like to work things out. One week later, she gave me a call, she confesses that 'she misses me and would like to work things out'. We went out for coffee and it was very neutral. She wanted to kiss me but unfortunately I had bad breath ):. But from there on-wards, I brushed my teeth more, took more care of my oral health. No one has ever told me I've had bad breath. Heres the tricky bit, I asked if she would like to watch a movie with me. But she replied with 'I'll see' which essentially means no. So, I backed off a little and gave her some time. I gave her a call a couple of days after and asked her if she would like to go to the Night Market with me. She agreed. She said that shed love to go with me because she had no one else to go with. A couple of days after she told me : 'Im not sure about the Night market. I dont think its a good idea. I think we should take it slow'. Days later she told me that shes going with her parents because her parents have the week off from work. I ended up not going because it would be awkward meeting her family again, when we are not together. I have tiny tiny doubts that shes lying, but i really hope she isnt. I really love this woman and I want to reconcile with her. She has called me to stating that she would like to work things out. When i talk to her online or via text messaging, it gets awkward sometimes. That's why i try to refrain from it. i wait for her to contact me instead. I don't want to sound needy or clingy by calling her and asking her out again.What should I do so that It can lead to a successful reconciliation ? How should I approach this, I really need some advice. This semi hot/cold treatment is driving me nuts.
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male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (26 September 2015):
 Sorry but I don't see this working out for you. I think you are getting the slow let down.
All you can do is back off, and let her come to you if she wants to. Your apparent disinterest might just be the tactic to lure her back.
Sometimes a bit of space can give the other person time to consider what they really want. There is no magic potion or charm I can offer.
Chin up!
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