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female
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anonymous
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for over a year and we've had our shares of ups and downs. Now we are looking for a flat together..however every night(or there abouts) he has nightmares about the mistakes that I have made. He doesn't let it affect him, or us, but im so scared that these nightmares are not going to go away, or even get worse. What can I do to get rid of these images? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Yos  +, writes (31 May 2006):
 He is having nightmares about your mistakes? It's hard to know what to say without knowing a little about what these are, what you told him and how he reacted.
There are many reasons that these nightmares could be being triggered: perhaps he is jealous or threatened, perhaps your past triggers similar memories for him, or maybe they are unrelated to you, but what you have said has somehow gotten incorporated. It could be related to you, but it also could be nothing to do with you. They are his nightmares after all, not yours.
You will probably need to dig into your respective pasts and your insecurities to get to the bottom of what is going on. This could be long and painful. My recommendation for doing this is to make sure you remain positive, and that you continually express your love and commitment to each other whilst you are doing it. If the problem feels serious to you, and you feel you are not going to be able to get past it, you could consider a councillor or therapist.
A
female
reader, sasha93 +, writes (31 May 2006):
 well i think your bf needs to goto a doctors or wereever u go for nightmares but thats the only way its going to get rid of them! you cantr let this affect you but if it does theres other things you can do such as talk about it with each other maybe getting out in the open may help it never helps keeping things in its always better to talk about things but thats what im here forxxx
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