A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I can't believe I'm 30 years old and asking this question, but my social skills are not the greatest so here goes. Tl;dr "does he like me?"A few years ago I met this guy in passing at an event I basically strayed into while out walking around. We started talking about outdoor adventures and as it turns out we had a few mutual friends, so we added one another on social media. A month or two later I was participating in a multi-day athletic event that I can't really describe without totally compromising anonymity. Anyway, he was somewhat in the area and had been following my progress on social media and basically came out to the middle of nowhere to say hi. Without going into details, this took considerable planning and effort on his part.I should clarify that both meetings were strictly platonic. We were both in long term, committed relationships with others at the time, and literally nothing happened other than conversation between two fellow adventurous souls. We might've shaken hands, I don't remember. That was it.Fast forward to a few weeks ago. We don't live in the same area, so I haven't seen this guy since he met me out in the middle of nowhere. We are now both single, our relationships having ended separately some time ago. I think he dated someone else afterward; I haven't. Anyway, I posted a photo on my social media page and out of the blue he commented on it and then sent me a message, which turned into a brief conversation, which turned into him saying we should hang out sometime. Lots of people say this sort of thing vaguely and never turn it into concrete plans to do anything, so I didn't think much of it, but within a couple days he had come back with an invite for a one-on-one activity about a week out. Thing is he's really good at this particular activity, is well known in the local area among people that share his interest in it, and could easily find experienced friends to go with, which would probably be more fun for him if he was just in it for the sake of visiting the place we'll be checking out. I've never tried it before, so he'd basically be teaching me.He is a few years older than I am.Things that make me think he might be interested:- This invite; it's going to be just the two of us out in the middle of nowhere doing an activity that requires communication and trust- He has plans for a short trip this weekend, and when a member of the group he's going with had to bail he asked if I was interested in joining (I couldn't, too short notice)- I had to call him with some questions about gear the other day, and it turned into a two-and-a-half-hour conversation that didn't end till after midnight. I'd say we hit it off. Lots of laughing. We have a lot of interests in common. He said my name a lot.Things that make me think I may be reading too much into it:- He seems to have lots of friends, both male and female, so this may just be him being friendly. He comes across as someone who is super kind to everyone and also pretty humble about the things he is good at.- He *was* driving when I called him, so maybe he was just bored and talking helped him stay awake.- The girls I've seen him date definitely have a type (curvy and blonde) and I'm the complete opposite. I may be unique and interesting, but objectively, I'm not super attractive.- We don't live particularly close to one another, and our work schedules don't overlap very well. If he's looking to date someone, I'm definitely not a convenient choice.Obviously I'm going to go on this outing with him and I feel like that may help answer my question but in the meantime these butterflies and I are curious as to what you all think! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2018): he seems interested! Go for it! You already had a phone conversation that didn't end till after midnight with lots of laughing and a lot of interests in common. Enjoy yourself and enjoy getting to know him. If you like him then show him, flirt a little. You can always consider giving him a kiss at the end…
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (20 April 2018):
 He does sound interested.
Maybe he has dated ONE type but has found that in the long run a "type" doesn't always make a good match. You on the other hand might.
He might also just want to increase his social circle of ACTIVE people and you are exactly that.
If he IS single, I'd say go. Keep it platonic on the trip, take your time to get to know him and to gauge his personality.
Whether you two will be dating at some point? Who know, but why put the horse before the cart so soon?
Just go have a fun adventure!
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (20 April 2018):
 I think he sounds great... And he seems interested! Go for the activity that he's invited you for and see how things go.
Do let us know!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2018): By all description it sounds like he has found a friend with similar interests. Long-talks and invitations aren't necessarily leading to romantic-interests. Everything you have described is so generic, I couldn't find anything signaling romantic-interest. Just someone who's looking for company and remembered you.
I'm not trying to burst your bubble. If no flirtations have been extended and exchanged; and he didn't asked you out on a real date, which offers the opportunity for romantic-exchange. I would just take it all at face-value. Not to say he won't be more revealing of his intention and extend some flirtation down the line. It's just that he hasn't so far.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (19 April 2018):
 Honestly I think you are trying to run before you can walk! Slow down! From reading what you have wrote it does sound like he is interested. So the only advice I can give you is to go and enjoy yourself. See how you both get on and take it from there. If you like him then show him, flirt a little. But other than that just enjoy yourself and enjoy getting to know him. But also do remember that it might not work out and you could just end up being really good friends.
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