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We were so close and he knew how much it hurt me...do I have a right to be so pissed?

Tagged as: Friends, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (27 July 2010) 6 Answers - (Newest, 30 July 2010)
A female United States age 26-29, *uvDrunk writes:

hey,

So my best guy friend finnally admitted that he liked me. Then a week later he asked me out. But I told him, i'd go out with him if he asked me in person instead of ovr a txt so we planned to go hang out the next night. The next morning after he got off work he texted me saying how he wanted to stay friends because he didn't want to lose our relationship as friends...i was so mad and humiliated. He's a yr younger than me so i told him that i'd make my friends b nice and i really did care about him.

It's been a couple weeks and i kinda got ovr it but we dont talk much anymore and now he has a new gf. I'm pretty sure that they met at his work and he burned me because he liked her...Now i'm even more pissed at him, how could he do that to me? We were so close and he knew how much it hurt me...do I have a rite to be so pissed or am i just ovr reacting? I really need some advice!

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A female reader, LuvDrunk United States +, writes (30 July 2010):

LuvDrunk is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I'm pretty much ovr it...I still hang with him in groups as friends but not much more...i've also found some one new who likes me and it's helped a lot...the only reason i got so upset was becuz i'm an open book, i let people in really easily and i'm extremely passionate and loving, i'd do anything within my power for my friends and when they break my trust i don't know how they'll ever get it back...I refuse to be burned twice...

Thank You all so much for your help and advice, i just didn't want to feel wrong for being pissed.

Thanks!

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A female reader, Moo's Mum New Zealand +, writes (27 July 2010):

Moo's Mum agony auntYep I'd be pissed! But set a time limit on it. Allow youself to be pissed for a couple of weeks and then shake it off. You don't want to become bitter and twisted by it.

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A female reader, Moo's Mum New Zealand +, writes (27 July 2010):

Moo's Mum agony auntYep I'd be pissed! But set a time limit on it. Allow youself to be pissed for a couple of weeks and then shake it off. You don't want to become bitter and twisted by it.

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A male reader, The Realist Canada +, writes (27 July 2010):

The Realist agony auntYou should try not to let it bother you so much although you do have a right to feel the way you do. He probably asked you out on a spur of the moment thing and because you gave him time to think he realized that he didn't want to date you. In a way its better to know this way rather than date for a while when he knows he's not fully interested. It almost sounds to me that he just wanted a gf at the time and it didn't matter who it was. You're better off without him, move on and find a guy who really wants you.

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A female reader, tammarnie Ireland +, writes (27 July 2010):

of course you have a right to be annoyed but if you look at it from his point of view. By becoming your boyfriend if things dont work out between you the he will lose a good friend. he has probably got himself a girlfriend as quickly as he could so he does not have to face the questions that you so badly want to ask him, that is also why he is avoiding you. my advice is play it down, act just like a friend and only a friend and if he ever mentions that he was glad you just stayed friends you can explain that life is too short to plan relationships and that you could have been good together but you enjoy being friends so no harm done. if it was meant to be it will happen

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A female reader, AskRosie United Kingdom +, writes (27 July 2010):

AskRosie agony aunthunni i think that you are right to be pissed with him. He's most probably trying to make you jealous, by flaunting this new girl in front of you.

He's messing you around, and to be perfectly honest, if he's doing that, then he's not worth being a friend to.

If he's a year younger than you, leave him to it, he's obviously immature, and you deserve better.

You are way to good for someone like that- my advice is move on. If it's you he wants then he's going to have to prove that to you. Don't break the friendship- but why don't you make him jealous?

If he knows how to burn you, that's not always good, so show him that it doesn't bother you.

Hope this helps

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