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We fist fight all the time and it's not getting better... help!

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 January 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 22 January 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, *WHY ME? writes:

Well i was with my girlfriend for a year and a half. We spent so much time together, and as i look back i think that is where some of the problem started. I had so many friends even me and my exes was cool, and she did not like that. I talked to her brother and asked what to do, and he told me if i loved here i would change my number and i did. It seem like that was not enough so i turned my phone off completely. By this time we had moved to my apartment, and i still kept in touch with those who had an e-mail address. I really don't know but she said i left my email open and what she read did not sound like a friend but an lover.

I told her she was reading too much in to it, but she did not believe me. I guess she was trying to scare me up by choking me and stuff but in the end my answer stayed the same. After that things were like an roll a coaster because ever month after that we was getting into it. She is a computer mastermind so she was cracking open my e-mails and by this time i had another phone and she was going through that. After that i still love her and wanted to move into another place for a fresh start. but things quickly went down hill, we was still fussing.

She went on a business trip for her job and that really gave me time to think. I wanted to wait till she got home but she insisted i tell her over the phone and i did. when she got home things got so crazy someone should have called the police on us because it was none stop yelling. she acted like she was going to kill her self, and acted like she had a gun to kill me. We soon smoothed things to a point it though was livable. We was not back together but we still had sex and every time after that we got into it because she though since we was making live that patched everything up. Sure enough as she saw i was not backing down the abuse started back, and this time she was pushing and jerking on me and blocking me so i could not leave.

One night i ran out the house with a shirt and no pants on just to get away. She said she put her hands on me because i'm not looking at her or i'm trying to walk away but i don't think that is a good reason. We have been broken up for 4 months and still living together. We just got the fighting because i told her i slept with a man this month, and in her eyes i have cheated on her. this time she tackled me to the bed dragged me off my bed (i did not have any clothes on) threw me to the floor kicked me, pulled my hair squeezed one of my breasts and tried to choke me. I fought back by punching her a lot of times to get her off me. Then that same night asked me to merry her.

We have been fist fighting ever since. i love her so much and really don't want her to go, but deep down i know this is not getting no better. What should i do?

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A female reader, TheXxHelloKitty United States +, writes (22 January 2010):

TheXxHelloKitty agony auntLeave HER

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (21 January 2010):

Fatherly Advice agony auntPeople Die from this kind of relationship. Get help. Get Away before she sees that you posted this.

FA

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (21 January 2010):

Sweetie, you are suffering domestic abuse at the worst level. You even had to fight back it was so bad. She has controlled you and made you get rid of all your friends, she has hacked into your emails and read them for no good reason, and has hurt you and beaten you. For your sake, you need to move out and cut this woman from your life. Deep down,, you know this will get worse. You know you need to leave her. Get away from her, she's not the person for you at all.

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