A
female
age
,
BigSis
writes:Sometimes, when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards, and all of their hopes and dreams. Now, if I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered.Then I say to myself, It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties. ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.{Apparently Frank Sinatra said that}.WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not!! WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~When we drink, we get drunk, when we get drunk, we fall asleep, when we fall asleep, we commit no sin, when we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~'Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.'Benjamin Franklin said that.WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~'Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel doesn't go nearly as well with pizza.WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~To some ~ it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!!WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff of 'Cheers'.*One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm* Here's how it went:"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo, and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way ~ the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest braincells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of alcohol eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and moreefficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few bevvies."WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make youthink you are whispering when you are not!Big'Hic'Sis!xXx
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female
reader, BigSis +, writes (8 September 2008):
BigSis is verified as being by the original poster of the question You maybe as frunk as duck but after the other night Meesh, I was in such a muckin fuddle!
I'm as jober as a sudge now, maybe later we could have a chat and the perra us can end up as nissed as pewts! Heh heh heh.
: p
Sis xXx
A
female
reader, michelleAKAmandi  +, writes (8 September 2008):
 Ok, on my way to Waz'z Bar... save me uh'seat!!
and um you may not be a thunk as I drink you are, but I'm errrr ummm.. frunk as duck!!
and last time I felt.. I mean checked I was a bit feminine so I don't think I'm a weird man either... LMFAO!!
BIG kisses!!!
Michelle
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A
female
reader, BigSis +, writes (7 September 2008):
BigSis is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHA! Tell me about it Michelle, last time I looked I was very much a woman....then again ~ BigSis might mean BigBro where 'peaceview' comes from...who knows?
I’m not as think as you drunk I am.
xXx
Pssst! You wanna beer? Meet me in Waz'z Bar...
: )
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A
female
reader, michelleAKAmandi +, writes (7 September 2008):
Big Sis... when did you become a weird man? LMAO
I love this!!! Abso-frekin-lutely!!!
You're a hoot... not a weird man...lmao, tell'em to feel ya, don't think they would call ya a man anymore huh?...lol
Pssstt... Save a beer for me...
Michelle
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A
male
reader, StevenRoss +, writes (29 August 2008):
haha, this made me laugh especially "WARNING: the consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not!" i'm really bad at thinking that when i'm drunk, ah well :P
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A
female
reader, Tremor  +, writes (26 August 2008):
 Cheers to that! *clink*
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A
female
reader, BigSis +, writes (25 August 2008):
BigSis is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHuh??
Now try reading the article again with a little humour in mind.
: )
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