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Warned that he was a bad boy but I still stay

Tagged as: Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (4 July 2016) 5 Answers - (Newest, 8 July 2016)
A female India age 18-21, *ranberrykiller writes:

Okay so, I met a guy through a dating app,he looked cute to me, and we started off really well. Turns out,he is an acquaintance of a really close friend of mine,and she instantly warned me of his bad boy ways,it wasn't really difficult to believe her.I and that guy got really "close" at a party,but the next day he told me that although he really likes me quite a lot, he does not want to date (anyone) which was kinda shocking but then I realized dont want to date him either, after a lot of contemplation.Yet I keep thinking about him all the time. I don't want to date him but, of late, things have gone much further than what "just friends" do. I feel guilty, yes. But every time he asks if I want him to go, I say "Stay"

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A male reader, Xearo Trinidad and Tobago + , writes (8 July 2016):

No one said it will be easy, but the only way to progress is to move forward. We have all been there so you are not alone. Think on the things you DO know on this situation and believe in yourself. Don't forget who you are and who you chose to be in this world.

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A female reader, Cranberrykiller India +, writes (8 July 2016):

Cranberrykiller is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you for the responses,

Everytime I suggest going out on a "date" he just insists on a "home date" which ends up with...you know what! I agree to him coming over, even when I don't want to!

Having thought over the replies on here I have to agree that I've been feeling the same way too, that if he is getting what he wants without commitment why would he want to tie himself down to one girl. I'm just letting him use me, pretending that i'm enjoying it too, but the truth is that I really don't. This is not the kind of relationship I've been looking for, I know that I have to put an end to this. I just don't know how to do that, I don't want him to get angry and do something which would be disastrous for me, or him even.

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A male reader, Xearo Trinidad and Tobago + , writes (7 July 2016):

You think he will change for you...but this will never happen. A person who does not commit to you but gets what he wants out of you, will never ask for more.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (4 July 2016):

Honeypie agony auntEh, let him go. You are wasting your time and no matter how SWEET and pleasing you are... he isn't into you and don't want to date you, he just wants his fun and move on to the next naive girl. I think you have the notion in your head that if you show him just how great you are, he will change his "bad boys" ways, and like you back.... HE WON'T.

So, what you should do is accept he IS a player and if that is not what you want in a guy (and don't deceive yourself with the whole "just friends thing, lying to yourself doesn't change facts) JUST block him and move on. There are SO many guys out there and SO many who are a MUCH better match for you than him.

Don't waste your time.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland + , writes (4 July 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntI think that you know he is using you, the thing is you like him but you have convinced yourself you don't want to date him when deep down you know that you want more than what he is giving you. I would be worried that this will keep going and you will fall for him and then you will be left heartbroken. Also I hope you are being safe as someone with a reputation could also be carrying STI's.

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