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male
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anonymous
writes: Hi.. I am in need of some serious help. My personality has changed since I tried to get close to my brother when he was hurt with his break up. I tried to offer him a listening ear and support and went so much close as to reveal some of my deepest feelings or secrets. I didn't know he would judge me as a traitor for telling him my secrets. But he started criticizing me since then and keeps on abusing me in public for the very reason. All I said to him was I wanted a life separate from my family and may be invite my parents to stay with me in future. And he got envious and started depressing me by misguiding me about the world and the society and how bad people were in my society.I changed from a positive, non-judgemental, respecting person to a judgemental, hateful and kind of negative person. Now I have trouble relating with others. I want to get out of this negativity and become a healthy person I was before. Please advise. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2007): Ahhhh, I can kind of understand what you are saying thin it's quite normal for the personality of people we hang with to rub off a little on us. I think someone with a strong personality is less likely to change their ways according to someone elses especially if the change is for the worse and not benefitting.I think maybe you need to work on you a bit more, maybe by setting some guaranteed time out every week for yourself. Maybe you could take up a sport, go to the gym, or take up a class or new hobby. Something that encourages you to value yourself and get some pleasure in the world. Learn how to see your bro without taking him on too seriously, and talk to your wife about it.
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reader, pops +, writes (15 December 2005):
Get counseling from proper mental health practicioners. You are descibing a serious problem, and it needs to be addressed soon, and before the right people. No one should go through that kind of personality change over arguments with a sibling. Get help, now.
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