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Three months. What can I do to forget him? why did he cheat?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Breaking up, Cheating, Dating, Friends, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 April 2015) 1 Answers - (Newest, 25 April 2015)
A female United States age 26-29, *carlett101 writes:

How do I let go?

Its been three months.. I still miss him. I mean he left, he cheated, and we go to the same college and live like across the road

I can see when I am walking to school or leaving my apt if he's there.

I get a sense of happiness when he is there. I miss him.

I want answers why did he do it? I have made new friends but what I have with them is not what I had with him so it just makes me miss him more.:( what do i do to forget him? its been three months..

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2015):

Three months is not a long time for a fresh broken-heart my dear. The mind has to undergo a process to let go, and it can be pretty agonizing. Stop peeping out the window at his comings and goings. It is not making you feel any better, it's making you feel worse. Reopening wounds, and stretching-out your sense of loss and grief.

It doesn't matter why he cheated. If you knew, it wouldn't change anything.

You're angry now, the next phase will be a numb feeling. You'll miss him and feel a twinge now and then; but it will not seem to bother you as much. That's a good sign. It will mean you're coming to acceptance, and that's when you'll get over him.

You're better off avoiding the sight of him; pretend he was abducted by space aliens, and you'll never see him again.

As for all of us who do others harm and inflict pain; he will see his karma. What he did to you, will also happen to him. This will teach him how it feels to be on the receiving end. It will be his life-lesson to teach him to appreciate the gifts of love and trust. It has to happen to him, not only as justice for your pain; but before he breaks more hearts. Real love will evade him, and will be stolen from him when he thinks he has found it.

He's riding high and carefree now; but that is what will make it all the more painful for him when it does happen.

When you willfully and carelessly hurt others; fate will build you up, before it takes you down. Hard!

Focus on your studies and your new friends. Push yourself to go out and have some fun, flirt with cute guys, and keep a very positive-attitude. This will break his spell over you, and you'll feel your own strength and power coming back.

He's not worth anymore pain or tears. You just need a little more time for your heart and mind to come to that realization and conclusion. Your mind and emotions are running in opposite directions right now. They will eventually synchronize through logic. You're tired of feeling bad, and that will force your subconscious-mind to accept letting go even sooner. That is when you will decide you want to be free, and he can't hurt you any more.

Part of his karma is seeing you get completely over him. When you'll find your own happiness without him, or any guy. In time,you will find someone better than he is; because you are learning what to look for in a good man.

He is making you a stronger woman, and he doesn't even know it. Give it time, you'll see!

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