A
female
age
16-17,
anonymous
writes:So i've been in toxic relationships for the past 2 years. Horrible controlling relationships with too much abuse that i put up with. Now that's it's been like 3 months since my last one and i have a new boyfriend. He's a great guy we started off as friends and he's sweet and everything a girl could want but idk how to be a good girlfriend. I don't trust guys after what happened to me and i know he really likes me but i don't feel like i deserve him. He's great and i don't wanna break his heart. He doesn't deserve that. What do i do? You know to become a better gf?Im 15.He's 16.=]Opinions are welcomed. Reply to this Question |
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female
reader, iSmil3y +, writes (5 May 2009):
Try to get over the past and just think that this guy might be better than the other guys you've dated. Try to trust him because if you don't trust him then things won't work out. You have to be happy in this relationship, and you won't be if you're paranoid about him hurting you and he won't be either. The past is the past and it's never coming back so try to forget about the past and Trust this guy and things will work out just fine.
A
female
reader, b.rye +, writes (5 May 2009):
 You've got some soul searching to do. If you want find yourself in a solid, happy relationship with ANYONE, you've got to be able to enter it without so much emotional baggage. Build a trusting relationship with yourself first. Counseling would be extremely helpful for you in this regard; to help you with organizing your feelings so you understand them, thus resolving these internal issues. Getting into a relationship with the kind of emotional weight you seem to carry, places a burden on the other person, and it is not their responsibility. Find and fix you first.
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A
female
reader, WiseOwl +, writes (5 May 2009):
One thing is for sure that i'm going to say that you may or may not like...You are only 15 years old!!! Forget about all of the other relationships that you have had in the past because you know what? They most likely weren't "real" relationships..I mean to what I define as a relationship but that's just me. Okay it is a well-known fact that dating at that young of an age is lets face it you're too young to date. They I think are more considered as puppy love or crushes. So anyways more than likely boys at that age that you have had past relationships with are very immature and don't know a thing about it either they are learning as much as you are and making mistakes too like you and everyone else in the world will. Hopefully they will learn and so will you.
So for you my advice would be with this guy you can always talk. Talking is such a big deal if you can't have a two way conversation with this person than it's not worth it. Idk about this guy and his past relationships but I would think he might understand what you are going through. You could tell him that you simply aren't the all knowing of what to do or how to be a good girlfriend but if he doens't mind learning and growing with you and helping you/eachother out than you've got it made.
Just don't worry about that don't overthink it don't be so insecure i mean i understand where you're coming from cuz i use to worry a lot. If this guy is with you and he truely seems to want to be iwth you then that's all that matters. Don't think for a second that you aren't good enough. Because it's not true. Don't worry if it doesn't work out because you are still young there are plenty of others out there. If you want this guy then go for it full heartily but keep a cool head don't forget your wits. You're almost making it sound like you don't want to be with him. He needs to know that you want to be with him too if that's the case.
You don't have to fully trust him don't worry about that. Think about it this way if you two can respect one another that's close enough it takes a while maybe even longer to fully trust someone. And it osunds like this thing may be pretty new. So i hope i didn't offend but i hope this helps
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A
female
reader, 48years  +, writes (5 May 2009):
 Just be yourself and don't EVER cater to a man... he should cater to YOU!
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