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These girls that hate me for no reason have been filling his head with stuff! What's going on with him?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Friends, Teenage, Three is a crowd, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 September 2008) 3 Answers - (Newest, 10 September 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

In order to answer this question, you have to read this one:

http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-have-no-clue-what-hes-thinking-does.html

Okay, today something else happened.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog on my myspace and there are 4 girls in my school year who HATE me for no reason what so ever, they have even confessed to others that they dont have a reason to hate me, they just do.

They didn't like my blog because it had my opinion on fake girls and haters.

It wasn't to them, but they obviously thought it was to them, even though it didnt include any names.

So they got extremely defensive and tried to turn people against me and they had a proper reason to hate me.

It was only those 4 girls who retaliated, so I knew they wanted a reason to hate.

Also, the black guy I was dating took their side over the blog arguement.

And today he was hanging out with them, he's "best friends" with all 4 of them now. And they've been filling his head with all sorts of rubbish about me and he's actually listening to them and after school they were standing together, I was over by the bench, they looked at me I turned in their direction, they laughed and looked away.

I spoke to my best friend about it and she said because he was my first guy its going to be harder to let go because he's blocked you out of his life and wants nothing to do with you and doesn't like you anymore, but then I catch him looking at me quite often.

Any idea whats going on in the silly head of his?

PS: His screen name is now: "I Can't Say It, But It Burns Me Inside. So Its Bound To Come Out One Day :("

Taking everything into consideration this guy could be thinking anything.

View related questions: best friend, myspace

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A female reader, PsyCookie United States +, writes (10 September 2008):

PsyCookie agony auntAhh, I experienced the same thing, not the boyfriend part, but being hated.

Well, in my case, a lot of people liked me actually, a lot, just an exclusive group who hated me for my guts. The thing is that the leader of the group constantly tried to manipulate me and order me around, and unlike most of the people around her, I stood my feet and told her to back off. Ever since, she and her group hated me, just because of that. Also, a person I thought was my friend hated me.... just because I was liked. Or that's what I think it was, she was just jealous people liked me and not her.

So I agree with starismine that these girls may hate you for a reason and I also think it's because you're outspoken. And this boy really is a waste of your time. Don't go back to him if he comes back begging; he lost his opportunity when he changed sides.

As for those girls? Try to express no emotion at all when they make fun of you and if possible, ignore them completely. Their insults are fueled by how you react to them and if you look mad or annoyed, they will just be delighted. Also, a mock laughter at them will send them confused (though they might say "what an idiot" they will think "why did she laugh?").

Sorry you're going through but you gotta remember this is high school. There will be people like this in that place.

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A female reader, michelleAKAmandi United States +, writes (10 September 2008):

michelleAKAmandi agony auntThe bottom line to what you should do is... forget this guy and the 4 girls.

You didn't mention that you care for him, but I'm assuming so, otherwise you wouldn't have taken the time to ask about this. If he is going to believe someone else over you, then he's not worth being with. If he was someone that could really care for you and be worth your while, he would have asked and/or questioned you about what he was told and went from there. You're so young sweetie, as is he and this will mean nothing to you later. You'll be the one looking back on it and laughing.

I know this is sort of personal, but did you sleep with him?

and did the other girl know about you and him dating as you did him and her?

He's really not worth your time, even if he is uncomfortable. I'm sure he has had a chance to talk with you and hasn't. That should tell you that you're better off without him.

Let me know how things are going, keep your chin up and SMILE... you never know who may be checking you out.

;o)

Michelle

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A female reader, starismine1 United States +, writes (10 September 2008):

starismine1 agony auntYou sound like you are outspoken and opinionated and have the guts to speak your mind, which I highly admire about you. But at the same time, you do not own up to the consequences of your behavior. Do you really believe these girls are shutting you out for no reason? And was that blog really not about them? C'mon, let's be honest. If you have opinions and you want to be popular and accepted, realize that making public your opinions about others, even if you don't name names will come back to haunt you. And your ex boyfriend probably told them that you were writing about them because you probably told him this. But speaking your mind is not a bad thing, many a high profile journalist and book author has started out in life by putting his/her controversial thoughts in print! As for this guy, realize there was nothing between you but physical attraction. Start seeing the truth about your behavior, the good, and what's not always so good for others to hear and see, and start feeling good about your perceptive, nonconformist mind, which is, from what I can see, going to get you far in life (at least once you get out of that drama world of high school).

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