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female
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anonymous
writes:i'm really confused in my head. Sometimes I'm really happy, and other times I'm really sad. There's this guy that treats me badly, (uses me etc.) and I just can't seem to make up my mind about whether I love him or not. I keep deleting his number from my phone, then adding it again a few days later.Why don't things make sense anymore? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, moomoomoo  +, writes (10 December 2006):
 I say you get over this guy, delete it and don't look back, make some new guy friends. It's also painfully obvious the answers you'll get here from this one-sided question, again, a question that didnt' really need to be asked, I think you just needed assurance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2006): I don't think it is actually very important whether or not you love this man.
The more important question is why are you persuing someone who is using you? If someone treats you badly then they do not love you, nor do they probably like you.
You are deleting his number and addding it later because you are afraid to be alone. When you delete it, you are feeling stronger and confident, but without him, you don't feel like you can do it without him. I think you feel this because you don't think you are worth anymore than the way he is treating you. No one with enough self-respect would keep pursuing someone who mistreats them, whether they love them or not, would they?
That is why I don't think things make sense to you - the source of the problem is the way you feel about yourself, not the way you feel about this man.
I think the best way to tackle this is to concentrate on building up your own confidence and belief in yourself, when you have this, you will find it much easier to not tolerate people who treat you badly. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2006): Things don't make sense anymore because you have allowed this guy to put you on a roller coaster emotionally, and when ever you are punished and rewarded inconsistently, you run the risk of becoming almost addicted to someone else....this is not a healthy relationship for you as you deserve someone who does not use you or treat you badly.
Go ahead and delete that number and walk away...get your mind on other things, spend more time with friends and family who care about you.....in time your addiction to this guy will go away.
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