A
female
age
26-29,
*Xteach_luvaXx
writes:ok...do i hear anybody? *tests mic* ok...good. Listen please, i really need help. My teacher said i'm sexy and i'm only 13, he's 29. i love him, and i know all the risks i'm taking if i do love him. (The whole teacher can loose his job thing) Yeah, got that. We've kissed before, and he's said i love u to me multiple times now. can someone please help me? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, mondie  +, writes (2 April 2009):
I don't like hysterical reactions about paedophiles and so forth; people can fall in love with whoever, doesn't make you a perverted, deviant, sexual predator. That said, it is not right for a teacher in his position to be telling you that you are sexy and that he loves you. You are only 13 and I think it has to be said that he is taking advantage of your vulnerability. He might be being naive, that's why I don't like the idea of going to the principal and then that might go to the police and he might go to prison. People need to tolerate stupidity like this a little more. However, he cannot carry on with this kind of behaviour towards you. If only he could receive some help to support him against behaving this way. You are not to blame but you do need to find a way of not getting involved further in this situation as he cannot be erious about you, especially if he wants to take a kiss on the cheek further. He ahs already gone too far but if he only wants to do simple things like that then it is not so bad, but it really isn't what he should be up to at all. Reporting him might end badly so you really need to find the right person to speak to. Even if he has tolose his job, it's a shame that such actions can now lead to imprisonment. It doesn't merit that.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (25 March 2009):
Well since he didn't do anything more than a cheek kiss, he probably won't be arrested so by doing this, you've probably saved him from being registered as a sex offender.
Well done! xx
...............................
A
female
reader, jessica04  +, writes (25 March 2009):
 Thank goodness! Good for you! And nothing will be released with your name on it since you are a minor. The most that will happen is it might get reported to the papers, but you will absolutely not be named. It's the law and the school could come under extremely heavy fire if they release your name.
...............................
A
male
reader, Mr Me +, writes (25 March 2009):
 Great, Olive! You are brave for emailing your counselor and you definitely did the appropriate thing! I am giving you a standing ovation. :)
...............................
A
female
reader, xXteach_luvaXx +, writes (25 March 2009):
xXteach_luvaXx is verified as being by the original poster of the question ok do u guys wanna hear the email i got back from my guidance counselor?
Hi Olive,
Ok i will let the principal know about this and immediate actions will follow. Thank you so much for telling me this, t means a LOT to the student body, thank you for making our school environment a better place.
Best Regards,
Mrs. (ok not putting last name in)
...............................
A
female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (24 March 2009):
He can go to jail and lose his license for doing this to you. And there are good reasons why this can happen, because it is illegal for a 29 yr old to be in a relationship with a minor!
I'm sure right now you have strong feelings for him, I'm not denying that. But he is in a position of power, and him continuing on with you like this is a form of abuse.
Go to your school counselor right away with this. You have done nothing wrong and will not get into trouble for anything. And as long as you two have not done anything other than kiss, he will only be asked to leave the school.
It's the best thing, really. As a sub, this man has no right to be around young ladies such as yourself. He is a sexual predator, and is using his position as a teacher to get with you girls. Stop him before he does it to someone else.
...............................
A
male
reader, CrazyMind +, writes (24 March 2009):
 Olive...
Know that it may be difficult for you.
If you've got a close friend you can trust, it may be easier for you to ask them to go with you if you're going to talk to your principal.
Also, still; even thought it was just a quick brush on the cheek, it still shouldn't have happened if he was acting professionally.
Can I ask you to keep me updated, please?
[Send me a private message: http://www.dearcupid.org/mb/pm.aspx?username=CrazyMind] I'd be interested to know how things go, and how you decide to handle it.
All the best;
Crazy [Chris]
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2009): Tell your head teacher. I bet you you're not the only girl he's doing this to and in a few years time, your be too old for him and he'll be on to the next 13 year old girl. This man needs to be stopped.
...............................
A
female
reader, xXteach_luvaXx +, writes (24 March 2009):
xXteach_luvaXx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx for the help guys! the only thing about the kiss, that was sumthing that was like a quick brus on the cheek, not what you think it was. i didnt make out with him or anything...if that's what u were all thinking. and i probably should tell someone, you're absolutely right. i'll look into it!
~olive
...............................
A
male
reader, Mr Me +, writes (24 March 2009):
Everyone who has already posted has some very good insight for you. Read it and take it to heart!
I am also going to say one more thing that will be harsh that I'm sure the other posters were also thinking: he's taking advantage of you and your fragile emotions at your age.
Him calling you sexy is completely inappropriate! And him saying "I love you" is almost 100% sure a lie. He is playing on your emotions and trying to get you to fall for him because he is, as Emily said, a pedophile. I would bet $2,000 USD that you are not the first girl he has done this with.
...............................
A
female
reader, Teenage-Rebel +, writes (24 March 2009):
 First of all Love is a complex thing and you can sometimes mistaken a crush for love (had to get that out of the way)
It is normal to fall for older guys even teachers but having a relationship with one especially if they are 16 years older than you is risky.
He can lose his job and he can go to prison and probably will not be allowed to work with children again if you both carry on the affair.
You also might/will get into trouble for it and may be treated differently because of it.
I think what you should do is think clearly to your self about whether you have feelings for him or not.
then think about the relationship you are having.
then decide if you want to carry on the risky affair or end it, get over him and go for someone around your own age.
Personally i think he is way to old for you and that the two of you should just be teacher and pupil. You will get over him but its up to you when your going to allow that to happen. when you both are caught ? or when you still have the chance to get out of it before your too emotionally attached.
hope this helps x
...............................
A
male
reader, CrazyMind +, writes (24 March 2009):
You're 13.I doubt you truly know what love is. And, the teacher having kissed you is total professional misconduct.My best advice for you would to be talk to another teacher in your school; there should be someone you can turn to; e.g. your principal.You may not like the idea of it, but you have to tell somebody in your school. What is happening is wrong, and things could end very badly for you.Know that it's not your fault - he should know where to draw the line. You need to speak to somebody though - you don't know how many other girls he is doing this to, and things could go too far for one of them. You're in a situation where you could potentially help many others.You say you understand he could lose his job; but think of the further implications. If he violates a girl, forces her into something she doesn't want to do, that girl has to live with that for the rest of their life. That girl could be you, but equally could be one of your classmates, or somebody else you may not know.Do you think you could live with that on your conscience - knowing that you could have stopped him raping some defenceless girl?Sorry; you may not like the idea, but you HAVE to tell someone who can actually do something about it.P.S. Many guys are jerks. Wait a few years before getting involved emotionally with them!
...............................
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (24 March 2009):
You can either carry on and then you'll have to be interviewed by police when he gets sent to prison.
Or, you can take control and tell him it's not right and it has to end.
He won't just lose his job. He will be named in the local paper, have to leave town, he'll be arrested and possibly jailed.
Do you know what they do to paedophiles in jail???
And yes, that is what he will be called. He will get prosecuted for molestation of a child.
If you care about him then end this. If you just have a stupid crush or even an infatuation, then you can carry on and you'll have plenty of time to get over him when they arrest him.
Good Luck!! xx
...............................
|
