A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hello agony auntsI've got a problem which I hope you can solve for me, I feel as though someone at work is plotting against me and is telling untrue stuff about me to my friends and to a girl who I'm friends with about my past, he doesn't like me and I'm not particularly a fan of him but I'm worried that he's trying to savatarge my friendships. The girl who I'm friends with doesnt seem interested anymore. We used to get on like a house on fire and talk a lot on social media and in person, but since the troublemaker has come a long he seems to have ruined things and put me out of the picture.I've told the girl that I like a bit about my past, that I was picked on at school and that I've been heartbroken when it has come to being or having relationships, I'm a sweet guy and I feel ive lost my best friend as well as my other friendships I've got.What should I do? Please help.
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at work, best friend, heartbroken Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (30 May 2016):
 Hi *******
I have noticed a change in our friendship lately and I was just wondering was everything okay? I hope I have not offended you in anyway, if I have please let me know as I value your friendship.
From **********
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (28 May 2016):
 Keep it short and simple. Do not be gushy or dramatic or whiny, and do not bring up any " Conspiracy theory ".
Just tell her something along the lines suggested by Ivyblue. That you have got the feeling that something has a bit changed in your interaction since now you talk less freely and less often. You wonder if you have said or done , unintentionally, something that displeased her, or if anything happened to bring about this change.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2016): Thanks for the advice and I will do. But how should I word it in an email to her though?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2016): Thanks for the advice and I will do. But how should I word it in an email to her though?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (28 May 2016):
Ivyblue gave you a good advice, you should follow it anyway.
In any case , there 's another possibility. This girl is not just " a friend ", she is also the girl you like. You do not quite spell it out, but the very fact that you are so upset about having less contact with her tells me you like her romantically, as more than a friend. Maybe she realized this, it eventually dawned on her , or somebody told her, and she does not want that. One thing is shooting the breeze with a work buddy , another with someone who's crushing on you. Therefore she pulled back so that you would not get any ideas.
As a matter of fact, maybe she did you a favour- considering that many girls love the attention and do not mind whose feelings they are trampling on, as long as they get attention.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (28 May 2016):
 Ask her. Let her know that you have noticed a change in your friendship and if you have done anything or anything else has happen for that to happen.
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