A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I'm almost 23 years old and have had a lot dating experience over the past 4 years of college. I have no problem attracting men. They start off very interested, always telling me how attractive and smart and great I am but they always end up breaking my heart, lying to me, using me and then leaving. After so many failed relationships I find myself so depressed and questioning why I can never seem to find somebody who will treat me well and love me. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. All of my friends find men who treat them amazingly or, they are the heart breakers. I have never broken a heart yet am constantly heart broken. It's very discouraging.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you everyone who provided some advice. It was all very helpful and I appreciate it so much.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): I think you need to leave guys alone for a moment and fall in love with yourself. There is no greater lover for you than you.
When you're strong with who you are, the right guy will follow your lead when he sees how you love yourself.
Best of luck, Princess.
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A
male
reader, spinnaker +, writes (25 April 2010):
 Sometimes the best thing to do is work on your own goals in these situations. Too many times we are attracted to someone and the goals they have and once we start getting close to them we tend to abandon such things for a relationship. Over time things begin to get stale and we become disinterested.
Inviting someone into your life is having someone share your interestes as well as you sharing theres. Discovery is the #1 quality in the early stages of the relationship and reignights the spark later on.
you never go wrong by improving your own interests.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): Hey girls,
girl friend and wife have to be different person. for us ( men) purpose is different...
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (25 April 2010):
 Are these relationships, with or without having sex? I'd be firm about who you are and what you're looking for. If you want a just play around friendship, agree with the guy before hand that is all you're looking for. If you're looking for long term, be clear there as well, to try to avoid having the guy you're with, being a player with different intentions.
You may need to slow down or speed up according to how confident you are that you're on the same page with him. Relationships are not a rush. It's okay to take your time and assure he's seeking the same as you, before taking it to the next level. The great thing about taking it slow, is it weeds out those who are only looking for one thing. Those who aren't will stick around.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2010): Its always painful to nurse a broken heart. Very painful indeed. Some divert their attention to another person, some learn to love themselves more.
You must always believe that you are someone special, invest time in yourself to boost your confidence.
Frequent places where you can meet great guys, mix with good company.
Remember that you must learn to love yourself first before you can love others.
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