A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am 36 she is 44. age is not a problem as we seen past this in our first month of our relationship.we have been dating for over a year now and she has seemed to of lost interest in me. Our first 6 months were great. Sex all the time sometimes 3 to 4 times a night. She owns a house about 25 miles from me. here's the thing, for the past 3 months our relationship has seemed to deteriorate. She just been furloughed from her job Of 100,000 a year and recently lost a very close stepfather. i have been trying to give her space but she says i am being selfish. I cant imagine her saying this because i have done everything for her, Help[ clean her house, do yard work, bathe her dogs ect......She is not comunicating to me. I asked her if there was someone else and she replied no. She says it's not me but her (but dont forget i am the selfish one)She makes time for other people but not me. I cant imagine someone just stops having feelings for someone or become not sexually active. I dont know what to do. We still keep in contact and We go out every once in a while (1 every two weeks) She says I just need to be understanding right now and keep it on a frienship relationship until she comes to terms with herself.( dont forget I am the selfish one).What am i supposed to do, sit around and wait or should i go out and find another person. I just cant be "friends" with her after being intimate with herin distress Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (10 May 2009):
 Opinions about what each person would do could vary, but, in your situation, all you can do is behave as a friend. Which means you're free to find someone else. How much you should go about that, only you can tell. Just bear in mind that you have nothing with her, because she doesn't want you to.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2009): I think what she may mean by you being selfish has nothing to do with how you help her out, probably has more to do with expecting to get all your needs met by her and putting those needs first. Reminding everyone that (don't forget I'm the selfish one) 3x is pretty irritating and I can get the drift that she's probably worn out by this martyr type victim behavior. What are you supposed to do? How about finding things to occupy yourself and keep you happy and not except other people to fill that void for you, maybe then you'll have something to offer her emotionally.
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