A
female
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anonymous
writes:Should I tell my ex lover friend I think he shouldn't marry her? I fell for a guy much younger than myself over a period of 2 months, and he fell for me too, we slept together one night and it was amazing, but I brought up a question whether or not he wanted kids, he did, and I feel I am too old to start a family which I told him, I did not see him after that, and he called a girl he had known for 6 years and within one week they were dating hot and heavy, now a few months later they are engaged and he contacted me again because he left something of his behind and wants to collect it finally....I called a few times about it but he never returned my calls and basically avoided me, but he called and is all friendly, and said he would take me out to dinner if I could handle that...and pick up his thing.Problem is I am worried about him and this girl because he has been addicted to cocaine for several years and claims he has quit...but that is not what his friends have told me...his fiance buys his cocaine and does it with him, but he claims she only uses when he does, and he decided to quit....I am ooncerned that this is an unhealthy relationship for him....I also really have strong feelings for him and I want him, but I want him off cocaine...do you think I should tell him how I feel at dinner, or just let it go and let him go...I fear what will happen to him, but know I can't probably stop him from marrying.I would like for us to have a chance, but I am considered too old for him by society standards, and maybe I hope he really does not want kids, because he says he wants them later in life, he is now 24. I am really crazy about this guy, we really click!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2006): one thing you should never do is give an ex any advice on their new partners. it can be read as meddling,butting in,not letting them move on or just plain old jelousy. take heed and support them in whatever they decide, it could lead to more later in life and they would respect you for it.
A
female
reader, Love Rockx my Sockx +, writes (14 October 2006):
Thats amazing :) so wot about age? Love isn't based on someone's age at all! u are right to be worried about his possible addiction and i think u should call him out and be very honest with him about everything; pour ure heart out (its the only way. You need to tell him how u feel otherwise it will plague ure mind - i believe u ever onli truely fall in love 1 in ure life and maybe this is the lucky guy. but dont tell him he shouldnt marry his fiance because he will just go ahead and do it anywy - to him this is the love of his life and u dont want to cross the line with that and offend him. Be honest and kind about the whole situation and im sure everything wil happen for the best.
p.s. if he is an addict, well HE will have to make the decision to give it up - not anyone else
Xx Good Luck xX :):) !!
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A
female
reader, marieclaire  +, writes (14 October 2006):
 you should give it a go and tell him how you feel because you only have one chance and nothing to lose by telling him but be prepared for whatever he might say. and if he choses to get married and continue with his habit then you have to bow out and realise you are probably better off without a bf with a coke problem!
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