A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm a lesbian and one of my close friends I've known since we were kids doesnt know, she has never had a r/ship or been with anyone, which is her choice. This is why I haven't told her, she seem asexual in a way, know that sounds weird!She is a quieter, shy person with few friends and is happy to be on her own. I have had a couple of r/ships but never told her. Do I tell her? don't want to lose her as a friend, but as she is happy without a r/ship, I'm not sure if I should tell her about me, someimes I think she knowsas I sometimes make comments about women who are attractive and never talk about men.this sounds strange I know but im wondering if i should just tell her or leave it?
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female
reader, kassie  +, writes (27 March 2008):
 you should tell her i mean you are her friend and she deserves to know bcuz if she dosen't know or never find out the truth you may hurt her deeply.if you do tell her, a true friend wouldn't care if you are gay or not,just remember friendship is a vaulable thing.
A
female
reader, Cyg79 +, writes (25 March 2008):
 I think the fact that you are questioning weather or not to tell her, means that you do want to shear that part of your life with her but you are worried about how receptive she will be. I guess my advice would be not to sweat it, if the opportunity presents itself be honest with her. If you really want to discuses it with her or just get it out just make the opportunity and then its said and done.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionadd: I am definately not attracted to my friend, i'm looking to tell her to be open with her, as a friend it's complicated and it's hard to tell her. There is no way I would ever, ever want to have a r/ship with her, shes a good friend only, one day she might find out when i have a r/ship.
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (21 March 2008):
 I think that your friendship is already at risk because you can't truly be yourself with her. My question is why tell her now? Are you looking to tell her to be open with her, or are you hoping that she might be up for a relationship with you? If you just looking to be yourself with her, then tell her. If you lose the friendship, it would have eventually died anyways when she found out, so no real loss there. IF it because you are attracted to her, the consider that she might become really uncomfortable, so again you have to balance if it is worth the risk. Personally, I say go for it. Eventually, you might meet someone that you want a long term relationship with, and she is going to know about it one way or the other. At your age, the consequences might be more manageable.
If you want more info on asexuality, check out an interview I did with a guy named David Jay about asexuals on my website www.FBKradio.com You can download the interview for free.
-Frank B Kermit
www.frankadviceforyou.com (For LGBT and Fetish)
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