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Should I tell my art teacher of my feelings in case I never see her again?

Tagged as: Crushes, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 May 2017) 8 Answers - (Newest, 29 May 2017)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, *etroFangirl writes:

So I'm a 16 year old girl I'll be 17 in 2 months. And I am in love with my female art teacher. Sadly she is straight and has a boyfriend. I want to tell her how i feel after I graduate just to get it off my chest but I'm afraid that she will never think of me in the same way again. Also comes the problem that my mom is taking me out of my school to be home schooled next year. I may be able to come into school to take an art and a choir class though. But my mom has entered decided. So I don't know if I'm coming back next year. Should I tell her at the end of this year incase I don't see her again or not tell her yet but take the chance that i'll never see her again or get the chance to tell her.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (29 May 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntIf you tell her, you will make her feel very awkward. Do you want that? What if you see her next year? She will probably need to get the principal involved to set up boundaries, believe me you won't be doing you or her any favors if you tell her. I know at your age you think it is love, but believe me it is very common for a student to feel like this about a teacher, in a few years time you will look back and smile and be GLAD you didn't tell her and save yourself that embarrassment.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2017):

It's probably not a good idea to tell her, since that may just cause her to be uncomfortable. However, I think it would be nice I you would tell her how much you appreciate having her as a teacher and a good-bye in case you won't see her again.

I know it's hard; I'm in a similar situation, except that I don't know whether I loved, crushed on or simply admired her. She suddenly left school mid-term unexpectedly and the only regret I have is not wing able to see her one last time, say good-bye and thank her for changing my life.

I hope that helped and good luck.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (26 May 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntReasons it isn't love:

- it isn't mutual

- you don't know her properly

- your age means it's not love in the same way adult relationships are

- you're infatuated

There's nothing wrong with a crush, but that's what it is and you need to accept that. It will fade.

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A female reader, RetroFangirl  United Kingdom +, writes (25 May 2017):

RetroFangirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I know nothing will come of it. I know she doesn't feel the same. I just wish she knew. its not just a crush. I've had crushes before. this is more.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (25 May 2017):

Honeypie agony auntNo.

You have a crush on the teacher, an infatuation. JUST because you have feelings for HER doesn't mean you HAVE to tell her or that SHE return those feelings at all.

What exactly do you hope to gain from it? Other than making HER really uncomfortable? Because THAT is the most likely outcome. She will become more guarded with her students in the future because she will think she somehow encouraged your feelings.

She is your teacher. Just have the crush as a FOND memory of a person you really liked.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (25 May 2017):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntThere's no point in telling her. This is a crush, not love. She's also too old for you, a teacher (while you're a student), not interested in females and already has a boyfriend.

Let it fade, like all crushes do.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2017):

You can. But why go into it knowing you're gonna get shot down? Straight or not, she is taken. You have got to respect that. Even if she wasn't, there would be no spark because she obviously likes men. Be an adult and realise that somethings are better left unsaid.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (25 May 2017):

N91 agony auntNo, absolutely nothing would come of this.

1. She is in a relationship

2. You're a student, she's a teacher (You're still also classed as a child)

3. She is straight

This is a crush, this is NOT love. This will pass. Many students your age go through periods of having crushes on teachers so it's perfectly normal.

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