A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guysBasically, I met a girl who is 5 years older than me, she is 28 and I am 23. She is studying here and will leave in a few months time. I knew her from an online language exchange and I went to visit her and saw her during 3 days. During those days I realised I really like her, maybe love at first sight, if such a thing exists. I can't stop thinking about her and really want to see her again soon. Although I'm only 23, I've never felt this way before with a girl. Not even any of my previous girlfriends. I don't even know if she has a boyfriend, although I am fairly sure she doesn't.The problem is, the age difference is large and soon she will go home to her country on the other side of the planet. I really would like to be with her but I worry that she won't feel the same, and even if she did she may not want to due to the clear obstacles such a situation would present. I don't want to fall more in love if I can never be with her, but at the same time I don't want to give up on the possibility. I will see her again in a few weeks when I am able to travel to where she is, should I tell her how I feel and risk the friendship? She said she had a great time on those days and did seem so happy, they seemed very romantic even though we are just friends and we talked about everything. When she goes home it is not likely I will be able to visit her for atleast a year and she doesn't think she will be able to return to the UK for a while either as she has to work.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (21 May 2014):
 The age is not the problem... the potential for a VLDR is.
LDRs are hard enough when you are on the same continent... they are nearly impossible in the scenario you present.
Had you two been together as a couple for a while and she had to leave that would be one issue... but for you to "profess your love" (which btw it's not love) would not be wise at this point... too much pressure on both of you.
I like CMMP's idea.
spend time with her.. make plans to keep in touch (which is not too hard to do in this day and age) and just be friends and see where it goes.
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (21 May 2014):
I think that you should keep in touch with her after she leaves, but confessing your feelings and attempting to pursue something romantic is just setting yourself up for a little bit of heartbreak.
What's the best case scenario? She has no boyfriend, she likes you, and she returns home while you guys begin a LDR. Then what? How does your relationship go to the next level?
In my opinion while you guys sort things out you'll miss the opportunity to date girls near you. And it's very likely you'll never sort things out and it'll end badly.
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