A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been offered a lecturing job which I really need - I already have 2 other jobs, but since splitting from my ex, this isn't quite enough for me to live on. The job that was offered would have been permanent ie.a permanent contract - but was for one day a week.However, I got some bad vibes from the upper management in my interview - not in response to me (I'm told they thought I did a brilliant interview) - but because I just wasn't at all impressed by the way they handled the interview procedure (extremely chaotic) and they were not even remotely transparent in responding to my question about the future vision for the college - the head of school simply said "we want to be the best" (this is a pathetic answer and won't come true, they are currently regarded as a third rate / bordering on failing college. On top of this, the contract that they have offered me is for a fixed term of one year, not the permanent contract advertised. Three other jobs were advertised in this way at the same time, and for two of the other one's they've done the same thing - made them one year fixed term. The only one that is remaining permanent is a job that was given to an internal candidate who has worked for them on a contractual basis.However, I have almost 10 years history of working with this college as a visiting lecturer and I am over-qualified for this role - my qualifications and experience are superior or at least equal to the head of school. The problem is I made a late career change into academia, and now there are barely any jobs going at all; it has been almost impossible to advance.The reason they are saying they changed the terms of the contract is because they may re-structure in one year's time. They may or may not give me a job after that.But this would mean I have no job security and also would spend a year (as we agreed at interview) bringing all my expertise to a failing college and re-structuring the teaching modules - they might then chuck me out and find someone cheaper to employ !!All my gut instincts are saying 'refuse' - but, through necessity, I've always ended up taking on roles and responsibilities that feel wrong, because nothing better has ever been offered to me and I don't have the benefit of youth anymore - I'm 50 now and very worried about my financial future.Should I take this role? It feels so degrading - but colleges these days are all the same - they know they can get away with treating exceptionally well qualified and experienced lecturers like this. I do really need more money coming in.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2018): To the female reader anonymous
I think you should try doing what I've done with my life and then tell me that I lack street smarts.
Unbelievably judgemental.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2018): I think you need to come back to earth.The simple reason I say that is why would you put yourself in a place where you are very near an abusive ex.Why do you think any job is beneath you.If I were you I would take any job that is far far away from the ex.Any job mean yes maybe even fast food.Look you need money maybe tutor students? Anything away from the abusive ex. You even thinking about doing that shows you are not over him.Why you would put yourself in a place where your abuser can access you just boogles my mind.I swear people with book smarts have no street smarts at all.Get a therapist.You have alot to learn about real life and for your own safety it is time to get started.Unreal.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2018): Hi WiseOwlE - yes, it was me who originally posted the question about my abusive ex.I really was not tying to manipulate the answers people would give - what happened was I found out some facts about the role and how it would work. My ex would NOT be my Line Manager, someone else would be; the situation is that he acts more like a 'team leader' but he does not actually have any authority over any staff, he is just the one that glues everything together, if you see what I mean. He gets away with it because the college is failing and chaotic and he is a people person.Not only would he not be my boss but I would be working in a completely separate building - I teach the theoretical aspects of an arts based subject, so I would not be in the workshops etc, I'd be in lecture theatres.I would barely ever see him and would report directly to someone else. Knowing those facts, I didn't bother to mention them again, here - I really apologise if this seemed misleading - it's just that they were no longer an issue.What has become the new issue is knowing that this college is a bit like him - failing, chaotic, underhand and so on and so forth.My finances are in good shape overall, but have recently bottle-necked and I'm in a 'bad spot'; I'm selling my home to re-organise my finances to put a pension scheme in place and to buy a holiday home abroad whilst moving into a much smaller 'base' in the UK. To do this, I've had to really go out on a limb to finish renovating my property and pay quite hefty 'up-front' fees to conveyancers etc. As well as this, because I've only recently completed my PhD, and I've been physically ill whilst doing that (mainly due to the stress of my ex, not my PhD as such) my earnings have been limited and I've not been able to get out much to network. So, basically, I'm going through a 'bottle-neck'. I don't have any of my original family so I can't, for example, ask parents to tide me over. I do have one very wealthy friend, but I am too proud to ask for her help when I know I could raise the money by doing some extra work.WiseOwlE I do really understand the suggestion about cross-training, but the problem is that I feel like I've spent my whole life 'cross-training' over and over again - there's a sense in which I've been single mum, artist, project manager (in fields not related to art at all), secretary, property developer - life has been absolutely relentless. I started with nothing, from an abusive family who I could never ask for help. If I did NOT have this background, the idea of cross-training would be more appealing. Another issue is: cross-train into what, exactly? I'm a smart woman and, so far, I have not been able to think of an industry - other than school teaching (which I've tried before and hated) - that I could cross train into. I think the stress of doing this would really worsen my health.What I HAVE done, is also start to apply for research posts that are right at the other end of the scale in terms of how I would be treated; underneath all of this I recognise that a problem for me is having a high sense of self worth which is equal to those of others; I tend to see myself as not as worthy as others, no matter how much I educate myself about this. I'm trying to find ways to put this into practice and my concern was that, even if I take this role for a short time, it will contradict my overall aim.That said, I have a tax bill to pay in January, so I will probably take the role for at least 3 months and re-assess at that point.Thank you for your input - it is honestly very appreciated.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 October 2018): How's your credit? Are you behind on bills or rent? How certain are other prospects?
If you have other jobs (your post seems awfully familiar) for backup; but you need extra income, take it. It's only a short contract anyway.
There was a similar post, but the job was to work under the OP's ex; whom she said was abusive. That's a no-brainer. Refuse it, if you're that same OP. It would be re-entering a cycle of abuse; if he's a narcissist, and knows you are very dependent on that income.
Don't find yourself homeless or too behind on bills. Do what is practical; but you should cross-train into another profession or field of employment. It makes no sense to be aging, and unable to support yourself. Taking on jobs that offer meager salaries, and they're few and far-between.
If this post was written before; it's not wise to simply rewrite or recompose the post, to get answers or advice that you want to hear. You're a highly-educated woman, and common-sense or logic should override emotion. Manipulating answers to your post to get more palatable answers will do you little benefit.
My apology, if I'm wrong; and you've never written here before. It's odd that the circumstances would be so similar in detail to those described in another post.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (23 October 2018):
 I don't see it as being "degrading" They aren't asking you to clean toilets or lick the garden paths clean.
If you take the job, sure it's something you are over-qualified for AND it may only last 1 year. BUT at least you get your foot in the door doing a job you have the education for. If you do it well, you might FIND a better job and LEAVE this one, you might (at the end of the year) re-negotiate your term.
Having an education or degree doesn't mean you are OWED a career. THAT is up to you. You can't sit on your hand WAITING for things/jobs to be OFFERED to you. That isn't realistic.
You need to money so it might be, you need to swallow you pride here.
And I would also presume you have a trial period? So it it totally SUCK you can quit and look elsewhere.
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