A
male
age
36-40,
*ilk2g2
writes:My (ex) girlfriend told me she needed some space. Her reasoning was to figure out her own happiness and get away from the stress of a relationship. Later it seems that she wants to date other people but she says that its just "something to do." We have been apart for about 2 1/2 months and I am about to give up. She says this is her selfish phase but it is really killing me. Should I start dating also and just move on?
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male
reader, silk2g2 +, writes (31 December 2008):
silk2g2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWow here's an update Gina, as soon as I made the decision to leave her alone and date the other woman she came back and wants to be with me again. I don't even know if she's sincere or doesn't want to see me with her.
A
male
reader, silk2g2 +, writes (28 December 2008):
silk2g2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe were together for about 10 months before the split. Not a long time but we surpased long distance and other trials.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2008): Date the "amazing woman" and don't take into consideration anything your ex says. She wants her cake and eat it too!
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A
male
reader, silk2g2 +, writes (28 December 2008):
silk2g2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNew update: I asked without being pushy if she had any new insight on the situation. She said that she didn't know what to say, she hasn't changed her mind and that she is still in a crazy place right now. Its goin on three months and at this point I'm tired of getting the run around.
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A
male
reader, silk2g2 +, writes (28 December 2008):
silk2g2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionGina whenever I try to ask questions because the whole situation is confusing, we end up fighting. She tells me I'm putting too much pressure on her but when I step off and see someone else she has nothing but horrible things to say about the girl. I feel like she's pulling me and pushing me away @ the same time and it so confusing.
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A
male
reader, silk2g2 +, writes (28 December 2008):
silk2g2 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhat throws me is that she still says she loves me and that she misses hearing my voice. Then when I try to get the relationship back she acts all confused and says that she is still doing this for her. I want to start dating this amazing woman and I know as soon as I get involved the ex is gonna try to guilt trip me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2008): I see no reason why you shouldn't date too! Does she expect you to put your life on hold, while she goes out to explore the world?? NOT FAIR! Not reasonable! If she suggested seeing other people...I suggest you tell her you realize you too are going through a "selfish phase," and "just need something to do!"
In other words...get on with your life, and if in the process of doing that, you two should get back together, than great! But if, on the other hand, you should meet someone who knows what she wants and sweeps you off your feet, than it's the other girls loss. That is the risk she is taking during her selfish phase. Don't sit a wait for her. Live your life, and if you are meant to be together, it will happen. One thing is certain...she is being selfish! So Move On!!!!
Best of Luck!
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