A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Okay, There's this guy I've known for about 4 years but we only recently started talking properly. I like him but he's a flirt so I don't know if I'm special or if he's like this with everyone. About a month ago, he dared me to kiss him so I did that and we made out a few times after that but now, we hardly talk and when we do talk, it's when I start the conversation. The conversations aren't awkward or anything though so I dunno. I sort of asked him what we were without making it a really big deal and he said we were "friends with benefits" and he said if I started having feelings for him he would be able to "handle it". I don't really know if I should keep trying or just let this whole thing fade. Also, he's one of my close friends ex and I've told her everything that's gone on between us and she's supportive of whatever I want to do.
View related questions:
flirt Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Mark1978 +, writes (30 April 2014):
 He has made it clear - he wants just sex. "friends with benefits" is not a friendship. Its about two people having sex as and when it suits.If you only want sex too and think you can keep your feelings in check then that's fine, each to there own, but if you care about this guy please don't make the very common mistake of hoping sleeping with him will make him fall for you or change the situation. It wont.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (29 April 2014):
 I would stop being physical with him.
I also suggest you stop calling him and initiating contact and see what happens.
If he calls you and wants to spend time with you NOT being physical (making out or more) then do that but DO NOT go to his place for nooky.
Boys (and men) will chase a girl they want. They will let a girl that wants them, have their way with him...
there is an old saying "women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place"
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2014): I agree with the whole sex toy thing! Declaring to you he actually only wants you for sex?? This isn't personal, he just wants a f buddy!
I think at your age, it's important to not think about sex too much as a casual thing... Like the others said if a guy is worth your time, he'll make the effort to show he cares and devote time to really getting to know you... N if he doesn't, maybe he just isn't in it for a relationship ATM or feeling that chemistry.
Don't be chasing after someone that doesn't want the whole special package you are... You're worth more... Maybe in the future when you're both a bit more mature, experienced, things l be different.
Take care of yourself :) x
...............................
A
male
reader, wise-guy +, writes (28 April 2014):
Alright, First things first - Are you able to be in a friends with benefits situation? - If you like this guy or love him even I recommend you leave the situation well alone. I know it might be hard but come on, you're so much better than just being some guy's sex toy, which being a friend with benefits basically is. If he loved you he would totally have told you straight when you asked him what was going on between you. Im a 23 year old guy and I know if the first thing a guy says is 'lets be friends with benefits' that pretty much sums up his interest.Don't be used. Find someone who thinks the world and more of you :)
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (28 April 2014):
 I would stop making out with him. IF you want him to be your BF and NOT your FWB then don't make out with him til you two are a couple.
However, it doesn't seem like he is all that interested, after all you are the one to initiate contact and conversations.
If he was interested, he would make more of an effort to be around you and talk to you.
...............................
|
