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female
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anonymous
writes: Okay someone please help me out here.Was seeing a guy 1-2 times a week for the last few months. It was all good and he took me out for dinner and treated me really well. He was even planning on introducing me to some of his family. His b'day came and I bought him tickets to a concert which he was very pleased with. However the night of his birthday we got very tipsy and I asked him if we were an item, he replied that it was too soon to discuss it. I have been in a four year relationship previously - he has not really had any serious relationships in years. We are in our late 20's.I dropped the subject and did not mention it again. We went out the next night and had a good time with his friends. I left the next day to go home and everything seemed fine - he called me in the week and we met to go to the concert the next weekend, we had a very good time. We went to dinner b4 and I invited him on a double date with my friend and her guy. He declined saying he would rather do it when we knew each other better. After the concert I stayed at his, we were intimate that night (we had been previously) and went to work in the morning said goodbye. He went away with work in the week and contacted me by text b4 he got on the plane and as soon as he landed a few days later. He said he would give me a call but nothing. He sent me a text saying spk soon a day after he said he would call, it's been 5 days and he has not contacted me. He has something of mine that I want back and I am a bit annoyed that I bought him tickets to a concert and now he is being weird and not wanting to speak to me. What should I do? Should I just ask him what is going on? Perhaps I have scared him off? x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2006): I would ask him whats going on, next time you speak to him. If youve not heard say by the end of the weekend why dont you give him a call. It is not fair on you to be treated like that, left hanging. Something similar happened to me, had a fabulous night with a new bloke who i had been seeing a couple of times a week for a month. he said that he was falling for me and that he loved me when we were drunk that night, and then he began to ignore me. I think he scared himself with his emotions.
I didnt bring up the ignoring thing or how he began treating me until it was too late. If your bloke is just not used to relationships you need to set your ground rules down early and make it clear you deserve to be treated with respect and if he says he will call he should.
good luck, and remember you deserve to be treated well.
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