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Should I have an affair while my bf is in prison?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 August 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 6 August 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, *eauty344 writes:

The guy im with is locked up and im feeling so lonenly should i sleep with my close friend ? he dosnt come out intill jan 2009 thats A pretty long time .....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2008):

Well,you should at least go to the jail and tell him how you feel.That's the least you can do instead of having an affair.Break up with him,and then you can fufill your sexual needs with that someone else.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2008):

if employment prospects are the issue then equality doesnt exist if you want to leave him- although there is nothing wrong with this becuase of your woman nature- except he may go a little crazy (if you had a deep relationship)becuase this is all guys number one thing for getting them wired and perhaps the reason in the smallest sence (its about resources to provide for the needs) for all the wars in the world.

but he should have already given you the green light if he knew you well enough not to wait.

think of your job prospects going is equivalent to having your breasts removed! would he still love you if you didnt have breasts? probably not if you couldnt love yourself because if you dont then your less attractive.

horrible feeling isnt it- feelings are REAL. If he is the sort of guy who can keep it together in the face of adversity then he is a good guy.

but if you feel unfilfilled then being dependant on another guy is not the answer and sex for your aspiration and turn on with someone else maybe the key.

but consider two things!

If you were an independant woman who is making your own life would you feel the need for another mans affections mental stability and stature.

Does this other man realistically respect seeing as you have a boyfriend? hungry men are needy men- and not neccersarily providers or key to meet the needs- it maybe a front and sleeping with him will make things messy from then on until 6 months.

I'd say stop wasting your time around other men and sort your own life out- if you have emotional needs- go to girl friends or guys who arent obviously trying to prick and trick you NOT THAT YOU WOULD NOTICE guys are experts and yes sex does feel good in a gray world-

if you waited 6 more months if your guy didnt appreciate you for that then he is a dick with no head.

if you have zero patients have a nice life- just dont get pregnant before your ready.

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A female reader, happytochat Australia +, writes (6 August 2008):

6 months? Thats not that long. But I guess everyone is different and if you feel thats a long time to go without sex then you should break up with him.

Just becauses hes in jail, it doesnt mean that sleeping with another guy is ok.

If you want to sleep with someone else then you need to do the respectable thing and break up.

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A male reader, Collaroy Australia +, writes (6 August 2008):

Collaroy agony auntHey there,

you seem so young to be putting your life on hold.

I'm sorry to say but you shouldnt be waiting for him at all, his employment prospects have now gone down the gurgler and something like 80% or so of offenders find themselves back in jail within a year or two.

Maybe its time for a complete break .

good luck.

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (6 August 2008):

TELLULAH agony auntHi there,

Its not a long time really, only 6 months. Would you want him to wait for you, or think it exceptable to sleep with another girl and not wait?.

Another thing to concider! Is he likely to re-offend, or was this a one off thing. Because if he is likely to go in again I wouldnt wait for him anyway. Life is to short to live your life waiting for some guy going in and out of prison.

If I were you I would stay faithfull this time and see if he's learnt his lesson. You will only have to live with guilt otherwise. But if he shows any signs of going back there, then ditch him and find someone new.

Take care XX

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