A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I posted a question a few weeks ago: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-have-a-constant-need-for-someone-other.htmlNow things have changed, I've been to the GP and he's referred me to a therapist, a lot of bad memories have come back about my childhood, things got very stressful for me and my GP gave me anti depressants and a month off work.My question is, it's my best friend's hen night in a week, she's been planning it for 6 months, I feel it would so let her down if I didn't go but I feel I shouldn't if I'm off work, what do you guys think.
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female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (19 February 2009):
 If you were to ask your doctor who is a professional this question the answer would be Yes Go because although you are off work through illness your depression is made worse by sitting looking at the four walls so the best tonic is to get out there in amongst other people and enjoy yourself, people in work who would be there are not spies they are friends of friends so relax go and enjoy yourself if you didn't you would never forgive yourself neither would your friend.
Gina
A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (19 February 2009):
 Go, as other people have said going out is actually part of the recovery process so if you like it's part of your medicine....i suspect what you are really worried about is that you mention one of theseb friends is a work collegue....explain to them as above and I am sure they will understand and not do anything to put you in a bad position :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for that, problem is ive organised it and organised her a stripogram, and the bus wasnt quite full so ive invited 4 of my friends one of them being a work collegue, everyone has paid £15 each, not only do i feel id be letting my friend down whos hen night it is, i feel id be letting my 4 friends down who know nobody else whos going and dont know each other.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 + ♥, writes (19 February 2009):
 Going out for one night shouldnt be too much of a problem, just because you are off work sick doesnt mean your life has to stop entirely!
The only issue you will have is if you saw a work colleague whilst you were out on the hen night - it has to be your decision at the end of the day. I'm sure if you explained your situation to your friend she would not mind if you were not there.
Is she going somewhere where it is likely you could be seen? Or is it in one building where it is a private party? You should make your decision based on what her plans are. If it is a night on the town where you could bump into people from work then I dont think you should go. If it is a day in a spa or a private party in a local function room etc then you should be ok to go.
I hope this helps!
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A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (19 February 2009):
If you were off work with a physical illness then to go on this would both be dishonest and wrong mainly because if your physically fit enough to go out then you obviously are to work. However, since that is not the case I personally dont think it would be wrong of you to go out in this instance and I think to be honest given you are off with depression/stress it would be counterproductive for you to actually stay in; going out might aid your recovery. So, all in all I think you should go out and not feel guilty...good luck :)
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A
male
reader, Kepi +, writes (19 February 2009):
 Part of dealing with depression is getting back into 'normal' life, just because u are off sick on your doctors advice doesn't mean you shouldn't go to your friends hen night? I'ts not like you've told the boss you've broken your leg then he sees you skiing down the slopes in switzerland :)So yes, go, but take things easy and if it all gets too much go home :)
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