A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I wrote on here before about my uncle. This is the link to it. This tells you everything from the beginning.http://www.dearcupid.org/question/inappropriate-touching-from-an-uncle.htmlWell it hurts me so much that my pearents are on his side more. I'm going on holidays next week Sunday and my uncle is going too. I don't care so much about him now. really, if he touches me I will go mental! it's just the fact i feel akward and hurt by my parents. I really want to go but i don't because of this.What should do? should I go? would you go?
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male
reader, Wyvern +, writes (4 November 2010):
I think you should feel proud of yourself that you have been able to bring this up with the people here, and especially for being brave enough to tell your parents.
I can't understand why they haven't taken this more seriously, people do often want to believe the easiest thing to accept, and it looks like they have done this.
Fortunately the power that he held over you was destroyed when you spoke of it.
The police and other bodies here in the UK have alot of powers to deal with this kind of abuse, and you DESERVE justice for what he has done. Don't feel that your being unfair to you parent or any of that rubbish, it is YOU that matters.
Your parents should never put you in a position where you have to see him, but it does seem that they haven't taken this as seriously, if he had touched your mother in the same way then they would have felt very differently about it.
No matter what you do, i wish you luck, and don't ever let yourself feel ashamed or cheapenned by what happenned, you should feel proud of the amazing courage that you have shown so far.
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou! i'll stick by someone xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2010): Stick with your brother. Avoid your uncle.
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A
female
reader, Elydiese +, writes (4 July 2010):
I read your last post and i think you should make a big deal about it if it happens on holiday treat him like he was a paedophile make a scene people will notice and people will take action against it i think you should tell the others because one of them will take your side and take action against this sick man
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A
male
reader, chriskerman +, writes (4 July 2010):
My ex was abused by her uncle but she was 8 years old when it started and went on till she was 15. she was 22 when she went to the police and reported him. Her parent, it seemed to her, were on his side. they wasn't. they just didn't know how to deal with it. they didn't want to beleve it. he was convicted and he was also found guilty of 5 other charges of rape with other underage girls which, because of my ex the police found. i say ex because it distroyed our relationship. if you havent gone to the police already then i think you should he could be hurting other people. as for going on holiday with him then i think you should do what you feel is right. if u think he is going to do things that you dont want then dont go. its simple. your old enough to make up your own mind about things but tell your parents why u dont want to go with him. and if they realy are on his side and think your lieing for some reason then f**k em off. you will do better on your own, it might not seem it now but you will. i do feel for you but just do what u feel is right and dont put yourself in a situation where u havent got controle. sorry i carn't do more for you i wish i could. good luck.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (4 July 2010):
 I couldn't tell if you have managed to tell your parents that he is touching your breasts and bum. That you have asked him not to and that he has continued, is that correct?
Pedos operate by scaring their victims into silence. If you speak up and tell, his 'advantage' over you vanishes.
I understand you are embarassed by this but it is time to be very very brave and matter-of-fact and clear and direct. Tell your parents, or your grandparents.
If you can't tell them, please call Childline--
”You can talk to ChildLine about anything - no problem is too big or too small.
If you are feeling scared or out of control or just want to talk to someone you can call ChildLine.
Some of the things that people phone about are feeling lonely or unloved, worries about their future, problems about school, bullying, drugs, pregnancy, HIV and AIDS, physical and sexual abuse, running away and concerns about parents, brothers, sisters and friends, and crimes against them.
Whatever your worry, large or small, we're here to offer advice and support. When you are ready. “
Call ChildLine on 0800 1111.
http://www.childline.org.uk
Be brave and tell, so you don't have to worry about him, okay?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2010): that sounds like enough people, and enough adults that you should be able to avoid him. Your mom and dad want to pretend it didnt happen or that its all 'fixed.' grrr your feelings should be the most important thing, but even us~parents and adults~miss the mark sometimes. Go if you want to, but dont ever let down your guard with this man.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy anite and uncle with their son and some of my mothers friends are going too with their kids who are all boys. Theres about 11 of us all together thats going. nowbody knows about what he did. Not even my brother. I can't face him he turns me sick. I really don't want to see him ever ever again. But I want to go iv'e been looking farward to it. i'm afraid if things turns akward. I'm really angry at my mam and dad.
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A
female
reader, Pinkpies +, writes (4 July 2010):
If you have the option not to go, then of course don't go!!Are there not any other family member you can talk to? An aunt on the other side? older cousins? grandparents?A school councilor? a friends mum who you like?You will find pretty much everyone will be very understanding with you.Personally I would report him, but I know things may not feel that easy for you. Buy a rape alarm, and put it on a string around your wrist for when you sleep. (Don't tell your parents you have done this, just wear it at night) I fear for you that he might try and come into you room at night. Obviously lock the door if you can.There is absolutely not excuse for him touching your chest, and your family should know this. Maybe try talking to your mum again.Like the other person said ... look him straight in the eye with no fear, don't back away or put your head down.Please find the strength to talk to someone outside of your family. Call childline and have a chat with them.xx
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A
female
reader, Pinkpies +, writes (4 July 2010):
Are there not any other family member you can talk to? An aunt on the other side? older cousins? grandparents?A school councilor? a friends mum who you like?You will find pretty much everyone will be very understanding with you.Personally I would report him, but I know things may not feel that easy for you. Buy a rape alarm, and put it on a string around your wrist for when you sleep. (Don't tell your parents you have done this, just wear it at night) I fear for you that he might try and come into you room at night. Obviously lock the door if you can.There is absolutely not excuse for him touching your chest, and your family should know this. Maybe try talking to your mum again.Like the other person said ... look him straight in the eye with no fear, don't back away or put your head down.Please find the strength to talk to someone outside of your family. Call childline and have a chat with them.xx
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