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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi Cupids,I do not have a clue what is up with me. I really liked a guy for some time back when I was at uni, about 5 years ago, we went on a couple of dates but nothing serious came of it as I really enjoyed going out having fun and neither of us really wanted a relationship. He ended up with someone and they only broke up in the summer last year. I was very gutted when they got together all those years ago. I have stayed very good friends with this guy over the years and we have met up on many occasions, more so recently we have become closer. We get on so well - have lots in common and he really makes me laugh! I have always fancied him. I am 25 - he is 28.I went to see him this wkd - and he admitted he had sent me one of the valentines cards I received. the night before I went home we went out and we ended up kissing and slept in the same bed but we didn't have sex. I thought I did really fancy him but now after I know he really likes me I don't seem to be as bothered. He is so lovely and I know he would treat me really well. I split up with a long term partner 6 months ago who I was with for 4 years - he was with his ex for about 6 years. I quite like being able to do what I like and and the freedom of being single.I also feel he may be too clingy if we were to get together because of the way he was with me over the weekend. This is what I wanted to happen so why am I now having doubts?? I just get a little annoyed when someone goes a bit too over the top with affection and it makes me feel smothered.He lives quite far - about 2 hours drive - but is thinking of moving closer to where I am in the next year.Thanks for your help.xx
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (19 February 2007):
 You seen this man as a challenge, now that you know he's smitten with you, the challenge has gone! I would tell him you like and respect him as a person but you don't want to have another serious relationship with ANYONE at the moment. If you feel this way about him now, you'll only feel worse and hurt him into the bargain if you agree to carry on seeing him.
I don't know what you're looking for in a relationship, he seems lovely to me but there's obviously something about him you don't like, maybe it's because he's too clingly (or you think he might be, I don't know.) Leave him alone to find a woman he can shower his love and attention on and who will love him back in return.
Eve
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