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Should I forget about sleeping with her because I ccan't protect myself?

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Health, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (17 July 2015) 5 Answers - (Newest, 16 August 2015)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I want to have sex with a girl but I think she practises safe sex and have had girls and guys before.

I don't know what to do because I don't want to get anything because she's slept around and I know she doesn't use condoms. So should I try forget about sleeping with her because I can't protect myself because a lesbian or can I? I've never had to think about this before so in depth...

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A female reader, femmenoir Australia +, writes (16 August 2015):

femmenoir agony auntHi,

i would advise you to both practice safe sex & to both get tested.

It is neither here, nor there. It's not simply up to you, to state that you're worried about sleeping with this woman, because of what you think she's doing or not doing.

Sure, she should be practicing safe sex, but so should anybody that is sleeping with a new partner, or planning to.

Why don't you both go & get tested together? It comes across as more respectful on your part & less demanding of you that way.

Also, try using dental dams in the meantime, if/when you should both become intimate.

To be brutally honest, i would never sleep with anybody, until i knew that they were clean, so to speak.

Remember, better to be safe than sorry.

All the best! :-)

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (17 July 2015):

So_Very_Confused agony auntbut if you can't ASK her to get tested then she's not an appropriate partner anyway.

you need to be able to talk to your partners about any and everything related to sex. if you can't then you are not in a position to be having sex with them.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (17 July 2015):

So_Very_Confused agony auntof course you can be safe. use a dental dam.

for further information see this site:

http://www.avert.org/lesbians-bisexual-women-sex.htm

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2015):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for your answer but I can't ask her to get tested so I guess I will have to forget about it. It's difficult because I've never been one to sleep with anyone randomly but it's frustrating because I can't protect myself as I could moreover with a male.

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A male reader, BrownWolf Canada +, writes (17 July 2015):

BrownWolf agony aunt

You know she may not be the safest person to sleep with, yet you are trying to find some safe way to potentially kill yourself...and you want others to help you decide your own death???

What are you going for...sex...at the risk of getting something from someone who practices unsafe sex.

If you do get something, you will be sitting there crying, wishing you hadn't done it, because you KNEW before hand what the dangers were.

Is it worth it???

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