A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hello all,I have been seeing a guy for the last two months, and everything has been great up until recently. He was treating me really well, and doing all he could to make me happy, but then we fell out. Now, he is really confusing me. He stopped talking to me for a week, and then he came back and now he brings me over presents, but says he wants a freindship for now, as he needs more time to get over our argument, and we have slept together on a couple of occasions since then too. I told him I loved him, and he said ' me too' He also says that he never wants to impose on me, but seems confused, and in a highly emotional state when he does comes round. He says he waits for my texts,and that I take a long time to respond to him .( i don;t) and that he has wanted to come round lots of times, but it seems the communication brekas down somewhere along the line. I tried to talk to him last night, but he just got emotional, and i started crying. Now he says he wants a freindship as he needs more time to 'see who I am; before getting back into a relastionship. I am not prepared to 'wait' for him, but am not sure I want to break it off as yet. His behaviour kind fo contradicts itself, as he brought me over a lovely painting last night, then banged on about how he had introduced me to all his freinds and fmaily etc ( which he did) then we had sex , then he left. I am not going to do ANYTHING for the moment, but wondered if you think I should just text and finish this completley? or see what he doens and set msyelf a deadline to finish it next week? or give him more time as he has asked and just be silent? I feel the trust is breaking down, and don;t know which way to turn. please help!! Thanks
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (21 July 2010):
He's happy to have sex with you, but not to fix what has gone wrong. That's not good enough at all, and you really do deserve better. I don't mind him taking some time to get to you know you more. That was a good idea. But to be using you, sending you far too many mixed signals and crying here and there, that's really not good enough and you can do better. I think the way to turn is out of this.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes Anon, I think you are right - he is needy and insecure - not sure I can deal with it really. I cannot even work out if he is just those things or a complet bars**d. I don;t have the energy.. but do not know if should finsih it. he is so very childish.... I logged on to messenger and he was on today he did not say anything . I put myslef donw as buy - so then he did.. I mean. grow up.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2010): So, if he wants to be friends, then okay, but he must understand that there will be no sex! He does sound very clingy and insecure... are you willing to deal with those aspects in your relationship with him??
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