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Should I finally tell my BF im on the pill ? Will it offend him I didnt tell him before ?

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Question - (5 September 2006) 5 Answers - (Newest, 5 September 2006)
A female , *heskycastle writes:

I've been on birth control pills for a year now. My boyfriend does not know about this. Being a responsible adult, we use condoms everytime we have sex. The only thing is my boyfriend doesn't know I also use the pills to be extra protected. I know a lot of girls do what I do, but I feel like I'm not being honest with my boyfriend. There are times when I come so close to tell him, but I didn't. To take my pill everyday, I had to wait until he's in the bathroom or something. Should I tell him about my birth control pills? Will he be offended that I've kept this from him all along? Can I still ask him to use condoms everytime we make love?

View related questions: condom, the pill

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A female reader, Tine United Kingdom +, writes (5 September 2006):

Tine agony aunti dont think your boyfriend will be offended that you havent told him by now, infact being honest if he was really worryed about it he wouldve asked you are you on it, by now. It isnt really a big deal, taking the pill it just shows that your responsible and care about which way your life is going. So tell him if you feel is necessary.

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A female reader, Jadzia1127 United States +, writes (5 September 2006):

Jadzia1127 agony aunt I usually push the honesty card in relationships but...Statistically the pill SHOULD be enough.....but I would love to introduce my two wonderful children that were conceived while I was on the pill.

I took it religiously, wanted nothing to do with getting pregnant. After the second pregnancy the doctor started telling me the truth about the pill. 'Statistically' it has a 99% chance in working if taken correctly and if you have no weird reaction to it at all or any other medication. This actually cuts the odds down way more then the medical community wants to admit.

Anyone who has taken a statistical analyst class knows how statistics can be twisted to say almost anything.

If you want the protection and you have a hunch that your BF will want to ride you bare back if he knows, then what he doesn't know won't kill him.

If he finds out just shrug and state 'Many women take the pill to regulate their period'. You aren't stating you are taking them for that reason, but No man wants to talk about that time of the month.

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A male reader, CRS698 +, writes (5 September 2006):

CRS698 agony auntHi theskycastle, Why not just tell him you've 'just' gone onto the pill. If you still want to use condoms why not talk to him about why you feel you want to have the extra protection, although if you're on the pill that should be the only protection you need (statistically anyway)

I hope it works out for you.

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A male reader, GenuineGuy United Kingdom +, writes (5 September 2006):

If it was me i'd be fine.

Is your Guy happy to use condoms ? Most of us are but secretly would love to get rid of the hassle because it does tend to hinder those spontaneous moments. I take it you don't feel comfortable with that ? Pill is pretty reliable. If you are how shall I say 'fully enjoying' each other then you may not be protected against std'd etc anyway. just a thought.

Have you had any episodes with split condoms ? I have and would have understood if girlfriend wanted to use the pill as well.

I'd come clean.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2006):

It is best to be honest. Just tell him that you wanted the extra protection or that you've recently gone on the pill. He might be totally ok with it. You should tell him though.

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