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Should I continue to see my friend's ex because I feel happy and good with him, or should I ignore the feelings of my heart and end this before I ruin a friendship?

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Question - (22 January 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 22 January 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, *ovemyman writes:

So there is this guy who is really cool and awesome to me. He has me get over this one guy who has been stringing me along for months. He's sweet to me and cares about me and I forgot what that feels like. We can chill and talk and laugh together, and everything is cool. He's an awesome friend, and I know he likes me as much as I like him. The only problem with him is he is one of my good friend's ex-bf!!!! They broke up like November, she cheated on him with another guy and then dump him. He was so heartbroken that he wanted her back still. Anyway, I think partly the reason hes gotten over her is my fault. I don't know how I came to comforting him, but in the end we ended up having feelings for each other. I just don't want to like him because he and my friend dated for almost two years. I feel wrong hanging out with him, but it makes me so happy as well. My friend doesn't know that me and him are so close. And I hate to go to her one day and tell her I have feelings for her ex. I doubt she would take it very well. I guess my question is should I continue to see my friend's ex because I feel happy and good with him, or should I ignore the feelings of my heart and end this before I ruin a friendship?

View related questions: broke up, heartbroken, her ex

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (22 January 2010):

To be honest, she might not take it well, but she cheated on him. In my book, that's fair game. If she couldn't treat him well, and you can and you and he get on so well, I say go for it. It's not like he hurt her.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2010):

okay this is what i think. first you need to talk to him and tell him that you dont feel right dating your best friends ex and that you needs to consider things first because u dont want to backstab your friend. yes she did cheat on him and obviously she didnt care for him as much as any of you thought so you should go for it buuut! there is no guarantee that the relationship will work out so there's no point in ruining both ur relationship with him and her... so tell him to wait. once you've done that talk to her nd try to gather information about how she wuld react WITHOUT giving urself away, tell her "omg me nd guy's name have been getting really close lately i feel weird since he's ur ex" blah blah blah "lmaoo what if we went out omg that wuld be so weird" etc etc.. hope this helps

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