A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I really dislike my name, it is Cagla pronounced Charla, i am thinking of changing it this year before i apply for university to Charla, but i am worried about how people will react to this and am not sure if i should do so! please help
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male
reader, Neboraic +, writes (28 June 2009):
I think you should keep the name. It will make life difficult if you change it (im talking about official forms). Also, what difference will it make, new friends hardly ever see your name in writing. Lectruers will pronounce it wrong always but its no big deal, it happens to many people including me
A
female
reader, satindesire  +, writes (28 June 2009):
 You are putting way too much stock into what other people think.
Why don't you care what YOU think? Aren't YOU the most important person to please here?
Just do it. If someone says something to you, tell them to mind their own damn business!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno it is my first name! no because in all documents it must be written in your birth certificate name, i am 17
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A
female
reader, BusDriver +, writes (28 June 2009):
 Okay, I get it now.... it is your LAST name you want changed?? I had a horrible last name - was teased non-stop about it. I have always wondered if I married so young to rid myself of the last name! If you can't get married - or don't want to.... change it! Not a biggie problem at all!
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (28 June 2009):
 Well, good luck, "Charla", I'm sure you will enjoy the new spelling of your name.
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A
female
reader, betty_black +, writes (28 June 2009):
 Its the same name though, your just changing the spelling so what does it matter? I was born Ellie, and changed my name to Ella, i dont know why i just preffered it, and now i dont mind either but Ella's what im most commonly known by. Do as you like anyway, your only changing the spelling noone will even know.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit's not my last name its my first name, thats why its so difficult as first names are used so often, and i have been brought up with british values and plan on living here forever, therefore it should be alot easier. were thinking Alyssa for my middle name so its going to be Charla Alyssa then my last name! thanks for the advice
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (28 June 2009):
Go for it! I support you too :)
You don't have to explain it to anyone and you'll be meeting all new people that will only know you by that name- good luck!
Honestly? Some people you already know may ask why and then you can say that both you and your mom decided it would be best. Look, there's lots more gossip that's more interesting than getting your last name changed. You may go through all this again once you get married, but who knows, you may love your new name so much you'll keep it- I know people that have done that too! The world is yours and what you make it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno i really want to change it, all my life i have done it's a nuisance , i am just worried about how people will react to it, my mum is really pleased that i am because i have always been upset by it and she is supportive im just worried about how people will react to this, i don't want to be the center of gossip but i guess its just the spelling that is changing, i am also going to change my middle name , and my mum is choosing it so that it has a more personal feel.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (28 June 2009):
I'm going to play devil's advocate here- women often change their last name when married- no question. Why not do it of your own choosing? If it makes you happier and easier to pronounce and makes you feel more empowered- do it, god forbid, it would have to be up to you committing yourself to a man indefinitely to get that benefit.
I saw this episode of Sex and the City where the main character, Carrie, was spending all kinds of money on gifts for friends getting married. Finally, she registered her own gifts for a celebration of being single and sent out the announcements.
Don't let anyone hold you back on this- my relatives changed their last name way back when they came to America from Scandavia so it was easier to pronounce. My sister's husband changed his last name to his Mom's (she raised him) and made no bones about it. My mother changed her last name when she got a divorce to her maiden last name and I changed mine along with hers.
Sorry, but you do not "lose" who you are as a person, that's just ridiculous and as outdated as saying once you become married, you lose your identity. Whatever. I'm no feminist but it's not the 50's anymore.
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A
female
reader, Original shiraz! +, writes (28 June 2009):
If your doubting it now then its obviously not something your heart is set on and rightly so! A name is a personal thing that marks the person you are, dont change for anybody but yourself. once you get into changing for other people you loose who you are, never do that.
Your names beautiful and unique its better than something common or no offence to the bobs out there but something simple such as john smith. Id be happy with it, how many other people do you meet with the same name? Were all different in some way, be happy with who you are for you!
Best of luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2009): No - keep your name, different is good! And it is a nice name after all. Learn to love it - I do!
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A
female
reader, BusDriver +, writes (28 June 2009):
Why not just use a nickname? My father-n-law's name was
P.D. Lastname. His mom used to call him PD. (no one knows why) His friends thought she was calling him Petey. He was called Pete as an adult. No where close to his birth name! As a tribute, we nicknamed our son Pete as well.
Cheaper all the way around just to use a nickname....
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