A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Background: My boyfriend and I have been together for more than four years. We are in colleges ten miles apart and talk a few times a day during the week and see each other on weekends. My bf was harrassed on IM all last year by some guys or girls(?) saying how he didn't deserve me and how many guys were after me etc. I was abroad last semester and when I returned we spent every day together during the summer. I am missing him, but just too busy during the week. During the summer he admitted that when we first got together(we were just sixteen) he had a cyber thing going with some girl he met at a camp. He was crying and begged me not to break up with him which I wouldn't have for this. It did hurt the trust a little as this had come up last year and he lied about it. He did not go on IM all summer.We agreed that we would be open and honest about everything. He has my passwords to IM, phone and facebook which is fine with me. I have always had his IM password, but when I asked for his phone he threw a fit and felt that I would never stop questioning him and that it meant we would have a life full of doubt. Anyway these IM stalkers have started up again w/me saying he had another screen name which I didn't believe. I asked him and he said it was true that he had made a new one because when he went on back at college to talk with his friends, the harrassment started again. I was so mad that he didn't tell me and his reaction was to get really angry at me for questioning him. He apologized and said he was just mad at the harrassment and the fact that he had to make a new name. He claims he only went on to reconnect w/some ppl at college and didn't think it was a big deal. I still think it is and it seems sketchy.Please help...I love him with everything I am and I think/thought he felt the same. Should I be worried and how should I handle it. Sorry this is so long.
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male
reader, Tommy7 +, writes (16 September 2007):
You are right to be suspicious. If he has given you all his new passwords, including phone, then you may get through this. If he is still acting suspicious you need to look closer.
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