A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met a guy online at the end of last year. When we met he was in the process of trying to move back to london and had been offered a job. The job offer fell through and he didn’t end up moving to london. We still stayed in touch but not in a long distance relationship. He hoped he would eventually get a chance to move back to london and we could perhaps see then if there was a chance of a relationship.We have stayed in regular contact for the last 9 months now. We last chatted over the week end just catching up on what we’re were up to over the week end.I realised yesterday that he was no longer showing as active on my whatsapp and it looked like he blocked me. I had a look on my other phone which he doesn’t have my number for and he was showing as active and online. I sent him a whatsapp message from my phone and it didn’t deliver which confirms he has definitely blocked me.There was no indication or explanation. I feel after all that we’ve been through blocking without explanations is harsh and I don’t have a clue why he would have done this.I can message him from my other phone to ask but is this a good idea?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (24 August 2018):
 No, don't text him. He was harsh ?... Yes, but...
It's not exactly like being ghosted by someone you had a romantic or sexual relationship with. You were long distance acquaintances only, and while blocking you was not the classiest thing he could do, OTH I can see how he couldn't handle very well being straight with you. " Look, please do not contact me anymore. Nothing personal, but I have just lost interest and got bored of you ". Maybe not coming out and telling it like it is , is a coward thing to do, - but I think most of us at some point were or will be guilty of this kind of cowardice.
The guy thought at some point he could be moving to London, apparently now he knows he can't or won't- and he got tired of being your pen-pal, if you are never going to see each other IRL. I guess you felt he was more than a penpal, like a real friend- but let's be realistic, nowadays with social media everybody writes to everybody about everything, lot of words, and no depth at all. For all you know he may have had other 50 girls he is " talking " to, and he has trouble keeping up, - so he
" pruned " his contact lists , like lots of people do periodically.
Of course , mine is just a guess, the reasons might be others. But, at the end of the day, - he blocked you, signaling that he wants to be left alone by you. So oblige him; it's his loss, not yours ! You do not need to stalk lovers, friends or acquaintances; people who really care about you will always make themselves available to you : the others- you don't need them in your life anyway .
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 August 2018):
 No I think messaging him is a terrible idea. I mean he blocked you for some reason and you may never know but he choose to end this friendship so I guess you just need to accept that. Maybe he met someone and she doesn't appreciate him chatting to another girl. It could be one of many reasons. While I think it was a horrible thing for him to do, I think you just need to accept it and move forward.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (23 August 2018):
 Why would you?
What would you gain from it? Messaging someone after they’ve blocked you is odd behaviour. He doesn’t want to speak to you for a reason, who cares what that reason is? Get on with your life.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (23 August 2018):
 Well, you COULD ask him, but several things strike me about doing that:
1. What are you going to say? "I notice you blocked me on my other number so I am contacting you on this number to find out why"? Do you not think that sounds just a bit stalkerish?
2. You are not even in a relationship, just a casual friendship in which you chat occasionally. He doesn't HAVE to have you as a contact on Whatsapp.
3. A couple of years ago, my mobile just "lost" the Whatsapp app. Technical issues can sometimes occur. It may be nothing more sinister than one of those glitches.
4. Perhaps he shares something on Whatapp he doesn't want you to know about. After all, you only know about him what he CHOOSES to share with you.
In your shoes I would stop wasting any more time on this "friendship which may become more IF he ever moves to London" and redirect my time and effort into something more tangible.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2018): People block you when they don't want you to contact them. If that's how he feels about you, what difference does it make why?
Blocking seems to be taken so personally; and as if someone has cutoff a body part, or shamed you before the world. It simply means they no longer wish to be in-contact.
He probably never had any intention of moving to London and made it all up.
You don't seem to have formed anything official and it wasn't a LDR; so forgetaboutit!
My dear, find yourself a real romance who can visit whenever he likes; and doesn't have to move from there to here. The job fell through; and that apparently meant more to him than you do. So leave him alone.
You don't want a man who isn't gainfully-employed anyway. His focus should be on finding work before he finds a woman.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (23 August 2018):
 No, he doesn't OWE you an explanation. To be honest. You aren't dating you are just "talking". While I find it SUPER childish to BLOCK people if there is no good reason, ANYONE is free to block or not block whomever they like.
My guess IS he has moved on with someone else and chose to block you. Or he is an ass... Or he blocked the wrong person (which I doubt but it's a possibility) and IF that is what it is.. he will contact you.
I mean seriously, if someone BLOCKS you WHY would you contact them? Isn't the ACTION of blocking someone CLEAR enough for you?
Also, why are you wasting your time on this guy? You can't build a future or a relationship "maybe he will get a job"....
Maybe you should take this as a big hint to let him go and look elsewhere if you are hoping to find yourself a partner and not a pen-pal...
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2018): I blocked my friend on whatsapp accidentally and have no idea how it happened. I realized it when she messaged me via other apps questioning what’s was going on. If you have no clue just ask him it might be the same case.
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