A
male
age
36-40,
*rickgomez
writes:I met this girl about 6 weeks ago and right now we are in a friends with benefits type of relationship but it's really complicated. We go to school together and hang out a lot and we feel like we have a lot in common. The problem is that she just got out of a 4 year relationship and has a baby from this guy. She was abused physically by the guy during the time they were together until she decided to leave him but she still has feelings for the guy. This guy lives in # and he's supposed to come visit her and the baby in 2011. Keep in mind that she hasn't seen him in a few months. Since she has deep trust issues when it comes to guys in general, we decided from the beginning that we were going to get to know each other without labeling anything as I am afraid of commitment and right now her emotions are all over the place. Recently we met each others parents but it was more of a casual thing we didn't introduced each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. We also share other things that people in relationship's usually do. Now I'm beginning to get kind of scared because as I get to know her more and more I find out that we have so much in common and I really like this girl. But at the same time I am very clear that she loves the other guy and even if I wanted to take this serious it probably wouldn't happen right now. Right now were having fun and really I don't any expectations on the outcome but at the same time I get scared because what if I get attached and end up getting screwed over or something. My question is what do you guys think of my situation? and also can a complicated relationship like this turn into something serious? or should I just continue by the day and see what turns out of this?
View related questions:
friend with benefits Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2010): YES!!!! You will get hurt...more than you will ever know. This is a heartbreak waiting to happen and you know it deep down inside....DO NOT GET INVOLVED WITH HER. Don't wait for her to "get over" her baby's dad either because, that may never happen.
A
male
reader, faenon  +, writes (25 December 2010):
 Mate 31yo aussie here been through two rough relationships myself the girlfriend when i was a young lad then I met a woman similar circumstance who had three children to another guy we ended up marrying divorced when i was 29 due to her playing up with the ex half.From a fella who has been burnt by a woman in that sort of circumstance my best advice to you is not to get attached to a needy individual who still has hang ups over a supposed ex it's only going to cause you grief.But at the same time I am very clear that she loves the other guy you say? Find a girl who is looking to have a meaningful relationship after a friendship this one obviously isnt looking for what your after and sadly is using you as a sad rebound till the ex is there again.She is still in love with him is a sure sign to leave it alone dont get ya heart broken over it mate. Find someone who is just as much into you. you can love someone but you cant force the other to love you if they dont feel the same man always better to move on and find someone who is genuinely interested brother. Good luck with it mate hopefully you dont get burnt and broken hearted from it.
...............................
|
