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She's not like any girl I've ever dated, but I don't know what's going on with her

Tagged as: Crushes, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 January 2012) 1 Answers - (Newest, 15 January 2012)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *arfo writes:

I'm usually not one for relationships, I'm barely one for dating, I'm the kind of girl that seems to only get attention from girls with all sorts of baggage like being in the closet, straight and drunk, having girlfriends, husbands, etc, and unfortunately I'm pretty moralistic.

And then this one night almost a week ago I went to a comedy night, there was this fit lesbian comedian, and after missing the most perfect opportunity to chat her up with her own chat up line, that was it, I'd had enough, I decided I was going to meet my friend in the local nightclub and then the next morning I would just give up and join some online dating site as I thought, lets get real, I'm not straight therefore I'm not going to meet a girl as I go about my daily life, because although I don't show it and there are issues from my parents and everyone else in family that have probably made me cynical about relationships,

I'm the sort of person that if they met a person who they could see it really working with, there'd be nothing I wanted more. So I went with my friend later that night to this striaght club and I knew as usual there would be this one gorgeous lesbian who would check me out once then ignore me for the second fittest girl there. Well I did find that gorgeous lesbian and everytime she looked at me I looked away so I wouldn't torture myself with someone I could never have. she seemed to be wherever I went, then as it was closing she came up to me and started chatting to me. My friend left with our other friend and we kept talking, she abandoned her friend aswell and offered me a lift back to my flat even though I live 2 minutes away. We parked outside and chatted for almost 2 hours before I kissed her on the cheek and said goodbye at 4 in the morning.

She's been texting me almost non stop ever since, flirting with me but at the same time getting to know me and asking me all these questions about myself. I went out with her the other day to a pub, I brought a couple of mates who are seeing each other to hang around in the background like a double date in case it got awkward, but wouldn't mind having some time to themselves if it wasnt.

But another bitter friend of ours who fails with girls so feels he has to sabotage everybody else's chances ( he attempted to sabotage aforementioned friends relationship also) heard about it and decided to bring 4 more people to the pub and do everything he could to completely humiliate me infront of her, fortunately it didn't work and another friend realised what he was doing and convinced everyone to leave us. We finally left and she gave me a lift home, walked me to the door and we made out till some guy told us to get a room and we agreed to see each other again monday.

So that made me think, well maybe she wants more, maybe she wants this to eventually turn into a relationship perhaps. So she keeps texting me but this morning I said I was taking my friend to a gay bar and she said at least I might meet some fit lesbians. Do you think thats because she doesn't care, and its not going anywhere or because it's only been 4 days and she doesn't want to come off as too posessive? She was out tonight aswell she said some girl was trying to give her a love bite against her will. I went out in the end and I actually did meet a fit lesbian who kept trying to feel me up, I texted her saying she was right about meeting a fit lesbian, but I'd already met a fitter one. She hasn't replied yet, but it is 5am.

Do you think this is going anywhere? she's not like any girl I've ever dated, but maybe thats because I usually go for less confident girls, When we kissed I felt like that was a kiss that for the first time in my life that actually meant something, like one of those perfect romantic kisses in a film or something. But then she doesn't seem to care if I meet someone else. but then it's only been 4 days. She may just want sex, buit if thats the case why would you go to all that trouble? why would she be acting like she's trying to make me fall for her if thats all she wanted, especially when she surely must know she's so beautiful she doesn't need to go through all this to get a girl into bed. what's going on with her?

View related questions: drunk, flirt, lesbian, text

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (15 January 2012):

aunt honesty agony auntWow you need to stop over analysing everything, if you keep down this it will never work. At the end of the day it has only been 4 days, things sounds like they are going really well so just put trust in to it. She said that to you because yeah it is only early days and she is getting to know you so she was probably looking to see how you would reply. You need to give her hints as well that you are interested in her and see how it goes. Good luck.

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