A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I really don't know what to do about my girlfriend as was. she's been seeing this other girl behind my back for at least 2 months now and i've only just found out. i've confronted her and she admitted to it, she says she really likes this other girl, but she loves me. she's worried about out future together because she wants to start settling down now. but i'm not ready to, and i've asked her to wait. I'm 16 and she's 19. she says that she cant give me what i want because i want to get married and have children (when i'm much older) and that i can't give her what she wants. But she keeps saying how much she loves me and how shes never fallen for anyone like this, she tells me that she wants to be with me. yet apparently she's been telling this other girl that she wants to be with her :/ she's said she just wants to be alone at the moment to think about all of it. but what the hell do i do ? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (24 June 2009):
 Dump her ASAP. She is feeding you lines to keep you around. If she was as in love with you as she says she is she wouldn't be cheating on you. Right now she is saying all these things so she can have you and the girl on the side.
She wants to be alone now, right? So leave her alone and find a woman who won't cheat.
Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): Drop her. She is playing you, honey, and it's just not fair to you. I've heard these kinds of lines before from cheaters and they always have a smooth answer to your questions. Think about it: How much could she really love you if she is lying to you all the time and seeing someone else behind your back? Just because she confessed what she has done doesn't mean she's going to change.
I just broke up with a guy who played me in almost the exact same way you describe. He lied to me for months while he was sleeping with another woman. He confessed it after I caught him. Then, he swore that he wanted me and not her.
When I realized that he had been playing me and putting her before me for all that time, I just couldn't take him back. I ended it. Though it has been the hardest decision I've ever made, I don't regret it.
He deserves whatever he gets. This girl that you're in love with doesn't deserve you, sweetheart. She is using you and having her cake while eating it too. Not fair. Not cool. Drop her.
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