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She's 30 years younger than me, should I not get involved?

Tagged as: Age differences<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 April 2011) 8 Answers - (Newest, 9 April 2011)
A male United Kingdom age , anonymous writes:

I met a woman on holiday who is 30 years younger than me. We both know this is not long term but we enjoyed ourselves. She wants to visit me in my home.

My children are grown up and don't live at home. I am separated for 6 years.

Is it best to avoid getting into a relationship because of the age difference?

View related questions: on holiday

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A female reader, chick989 United Kingdom +, writes (9 April 2011):

my man is 51, I'm nearly 20 and we've been together two and a half years, it was love at first site. you say it's not serious bit whats so wrong in having female company with someone you share good time with- that's what lifes all about.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011):

I honestly envy you. I hope one day I'll be in the same situation (if I was single of course).

As long as she's 18+ there is no issue here.

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A male reader, wiseoldman United Kingdom +, writes (9 April 2011):

Make sure she's of the same nationality and culture as you are, to avoid being taken for a ride by someone merely after your money or a visa.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2011):

I was in a relationsip with a man 21 years older than myself. We lived together for over 5 years. And in my opinion, that's about the max of time a relationship like this can last. But if we were to have kept is casual and not put so much on the line for it, it would have been a pleasant experience. Our age difference wasn't as much of a problem as it was a humorous quirk we liked to joke about. Go for it if shes mature enough. Don't expect to marry er though. You'll end up getting hurt. Good luck.

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (8 April 2011):

Its fine - if you're 80 and shes 50.....

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2011):

As long as she's 18 and you're both on the same page about your status, then I think it's fine.

However, I do want to say that just because you both agree that it's "short term" doesn't neccessarily mean you both want the same thing.

If she's quite young (18-25) she might be looking for validation, money, or sexual adventure. She might have family problems that make her seek out a man as a father figure. If she's at the age where she's figuring out what she wants in life, she may very well say all sorts of things (For instance, I just want a "short term" relationship) and actually want something totally different.

Perhaps you don't mind indulging her, but I figure if you're in your 50s, you are looking for different things as well. Your reservatons about it make it sound like there might be more complications than you're will to share here.

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A male reader, serenity80 United Kingdom +, writes (8 April 2011):

If you want the same things and are being honest with one another, then who cares about the age difference? I don't think it is necessarily important. I'm presuming you are two consenting adults that want the same thing?

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A male reader, macdubh712 United States +, writes (8 April 2011):

You stated that you both know that this thing is not long term. I say, that's awesome that at your age you can get a woman 30 years younger than you. You know how many guys your age wish for that? I am guesstimating how old you are but just saying. Go for it but just beware of getting too emotionally involved.

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