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She has no problems trying to crush my ego. NOW she says I'm bad in bed. How should I respond to her insults about lovemaking?

Tagged as: Dating, Health, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 January 2017) 9 Answers - (Newest, 22 April 2017)
A male Canada age 26-29, *rayscreetch writes:

My girlfriend completely criticized my sex.

Said I suck in bed when she's been wanting me for 3 years saying that no one knows her body like me and she never felt this good before and blah blah blah.

But as soon as she gets mad at me that completely changes.

Our sex is good but it's not magical you know? Plus she can barely touch me she's always pulling away its annoying.

For 2 years she was taking it then one day she just changed.

We used to have threesomes, role play, sex toys, public sex, she'd give so much more.

Now she says she doesn't do other things and we just have sex in the bedroom.

And all of a sudden she forgot how to do some things.

I don't wanna hurt her feelings because because she's moody and holds grudges and I don't want the headache from listening to her talking about how that's hurt her feelings when she had no problem trying to crush my ego. So what should I do?

View related questions: crush, sex toy, threesome

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A male reader, sleepwalker United States +, writes (22 April 2017):

Have you considered that maybe she is cheating on you? Many women who cheat often start fights and demonize their BF or husbands in order to feel good about their betrayal. Our male egos sometimes blind us to the reality that our women are betraying us. Something for you to consider.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (19 January 2017):

aunt honesty agony auntI wouldn't want to have sex with you either if you where still in love with your ex girlfriend and a cheat. Honestly am not sure why you are repeating multiple different questions.

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A male reader, JohnSchorah United States +, writes (19 January 2017):

Maybe we need her version of things? Perhaps you could asked her for an honest explanation & post her response here.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2017):

I find it unusual that your age is 18-21 yet you have done all these things.How old is your gf? If she is in the same age group I am amazed how she can tell if a guy sucks or not in bed. You guys sound as being much older than 18-21 unless you are one of those sex obssessed young celebrities we are forced to daily endure their sex exploit news in the media. Anyhow as the other aunts and uncles suggested it is time to move on for both of you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2017):

Sorry but when a woman starts to criticize your love making abilities and sex, it means your relationship is pretty much over for her. And I will add she is being very mean and cruel about it. There is no need to hammer you into the ground like that. She was half of this relationship when the sex was awesome. She seemed to love it for 2 years so obviously you were doing everything right in all that time. But I think the reason it slipped is BECAUSE OF HER. She is not trying anymore. It has nothing to do with you. Maybe she is banging some other guy now and has stopped trying with you. So keep your chin up. I am sure another woman, one who appreciates you, will come to find you are a God in the bedroom. Toss this one aside and keep looking. You will find her. Why waste your time and all the fun you could be having on a GOOD sex life on this miserable wench? Bet you she has another guy. Or she gets bored easily. NOT A KEEPER! She is doing you a favour. Remember, it's not your fault. She is hitting you right where it hurts and I suspect she has other issues going on. Just seems way too extreme.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2017):

Time for a new girlfriend!

You've reached your expiration-date! She's been through it all with you, and now you're getting on her nerves.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (18 January 2017):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntMy suspicion is that you were all "into" her when she was into the threesomes and other kinky things. However, she got to a stage where she wanted it to be just the two of you. In other words, she developed real feelings for you. When women do this, they don't want to share their man with anyone else.

You, on the other hand, have found the lack of kinkiness boring and are probably "going through the motions" when you have sex with her as, to you, it is no longer as "exciting" as it was before. Her lashing out is a sign of her frustration that you no longer find her as desirable as you did when she was into all the kinky stuff.

You two need to connect on a new - more intimate - level and rediscover your passion for each other. You may then discover a whole new level to your love and sex life.

Try intimate massages to get you both in the mood. Get a good sex manual and try some new things - just the two of you.

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A male reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (18 January 2017):

olderthandirt agony auntSorry to be the one to tell you but you're not alone. It seems the majority of men I've talked to about this very subject have a similar experience. My theory is the adventurous spirit you both once knew is gone the way of youth. "Oh sweet bird of youth' I'm sure there are some exceptions but it seems that men want to continue the spirit of adventure but the women would rather let the spark go dim and blame the man for the lack of passion. It's not personal. It's more like a hormonal thing with the passage of time. Don't question her on it she is probably unaware of the changes. Just cherish the memories as they are all that is left you. Good luck.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (18 January 2017):

N91 agony auntYou really need to think about whether this relationship is worth it. Doesn't sound great to me.

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