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Sex - what do women prefer? And why do some women like to swallow when others dont?

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Question - (10 November 2010) 14 Answers - (Newest, 3 September 2014)
A male United States age 51-59, *sed2b12 writes:

[Mod Note: 2 questions from the same poster have been merged into one]

Here is a question that I always wanted answered by someone other than my wife.....Why do some girls like to swallow seamen and some don't?

What do most woman prefer, oral sex, anal sex, or sexual intercourse. And if its sexual intercourse,

which position do they prefer?

View related questions: anal sex, oral sex, swallow

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2014):

The preferences of women differ at all times. The taste or some other fobia, the fear of the unknown.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2011):

Everyone has their own particular tastes (pardon the pun). For me I am a late bloomer to oral sex. At 50 I recently became sexually active again and my man showed interest in oral sex early on (giving it to me from the first event) so in turn I got into it too.

Before him I'd only given/ received oral occasionally, almost like an add-on. Now it is more important. I like how he pulls me to the edge of the bed to give me oral with him on his knees. Wow... I wonder what that means to him. He seems to be into and stays with it for me to come. I am still working on being self concious. I do oral on him from the a low stool as I cannot comfortably stay on my knees for long. I love his responses.

Oral is very important for me at middle-age. For one when you are older intercourse is not always immediately available. Issues of ED and dryness come up. Oral becomes a part of extended foreplay and for me I cannot come with penetration, though I adore it for all that it means emotionally and the pleasure I fee from his penis inside of me.

Spitting versus swallowing? Early on in my younger years I spit I think once or twice and found that annoying for the mess and actually you taste more by spitting. Not the the taste bothered me so much but I hate the mess and disruption of spitting... so I swallow. I have him at the back of my throat so it goes down fast and I like to taste/ feel/ experience the essence of him coming that way.

I like that I please him so intimately - we've experimented with it at many levels. I like that he seeks to please me orally as well and perhaps he has some reservations about dealing with all of my fluids when engaging me orally, but overall I know he likes it for similar reason and he does request to go down on me so I know it is part of his sexual expression overall.

Anal? No we don't get into back-door action. Not interested.

I do like doggey style vaginally though. But miss having him face-to-face to see him, but I like the submissive aspects of it. As I like the dual submissive, active vibe of when I give him head and vise versa. It's all about adult sexual affection with the emphasis on 'affection'. And sharing the intimacy of orgasm together.

Positions specifically? Well my man is overweight with a huge santa clause stomach so when we make love it is hard at times. We do him on top but he has to really hold his upper body high off of me to keep from crushing me with his weight. He has very good upper body strength so this works out for him. The 'in and out' can be tough, but we manage. He likes to put my legs up really high which is new for me. I allow it as it gives him the feel he prefers. Rear entry helps but has limitations.

I really like this one leg up, one flat -- him sorta 'scissoring' me sorta thing we do for penetration. I am plus-sized woman so I can bear alot of his weight and he is very considerate about keeping his weight off of me. I've felt more 'crushed' and slammed to the bed with thinner men who have taken less care in putting their weight on me when on top.

We do me on top a bit, but then my weight crushes his diaphragm making it hard for him to breath so we don't do that much. It's all good overall with a higher emphasis on oral as that is just easier for both of us. Love, chemistry and affection goes along way where there are structural problems due to weight etc. Love the one you are with, or you should not be with them I say.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2010):

Most girls I know who swallow do it 1) because they love their BF and want to please him, 2) because they feel a sense of power over a man by giving him such pleasure and acceptance, and 3) some really like the way it tastes...not because of the flavor, but because it is, as one woman explained to me, "the essence of a man". Cool.

Of those that havent for me, taste was the main reason.

In my experience, which isnt all that extensive, most women prefer getting oral or intercourse. Probably intercourse. Even those who didn't orgasm from intercourse loved the feeling of penetration. Anal was never a preference by any of the women I've been with. All but one tried it. Only one was OK with it enough to ask again...and I'm not well hung either. I cant imagine how guys with 8 inchers or bigger ever get anal.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2010):

hmm i like the taste of it and it feels wonderful knowing that ur giving ur bf something back.

i dont like anal sex it makes me feel like a horse.

sexual intercourse is nice i like either me on the top or me underneath or both of us sitting those bring the orgasms 4 me cause they r very closespecially if u r underneath and have ur feet wrapped around him with ur butt off the bed.


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A female reader, serena23 United States +, writes (12 November 2010):

swallowing is intimate...there is also the gagging issue....which is probably the reason some don't swallow...i recommend a numbing spray that can be found at any adult shop. everybody is different...personally for me orgasm is soo much better with penetration...oral is definately nice but not as satisfactory.

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A female reader, kalykush United States +, writes (10 November 2010):

kalykush agony auntI personally have always been a swallower: that being said. i pick and choose who i do so for and how often.

been with my bf for for over a year and have swallowed 99% of the time. the only reason i may not swallow is right before i may sike myself out and just spit it out but i do so with class... he never has a problem. lately i have not swallowed because i am expecting a child and the thought of his sperm reaching our daughter (indirectly obviously) grosses both of us out.

as for oral anal and "regular sex" i am a fan of oral and regular however my bf is a fan of all three so to be sure he is pleased i will give into anal sex once in a while. however there are times when he will just take it regardless. i am the very submissive girl that loves to please her man as long as he treats me great outside of the bedroom ill be his slave inside the bedroom and he knows it.

as for why girls wont could be taste i know that it changes with diet. i once had a guys sperm burn my mouth because he ate a lot of chili peppers... it could also be they siky themselves out and fear they will gag or throw up ... im opinion dont think about it just swallow LOL

lately my bfs has been kinda spicy too cuz his mom has sent over jars and jars and NEVER ending jars of pickled jalapeno peppers from mexico. EWUH

my fave position is either doggy style or him on top. if it is anal i find laying on urside and spooning works wonders it doesnt hurt so bad. he likes me on top.

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A female reader, iSmil3y United States +, writes (10 November 2010):

I, personally never liked to swallow because I didn't like the taste at first but after a while, I tried it again and I have no problem with it, the taste is fine. I think the taste is what some women don't like.

I like both oral sex and sexual intercourse and the best position for me is when he's on top.

All women are different though, we all have different opinions. Like I said, the taste of the sperm is what some women don't like and as for the positions, it just all depends on what we get pleasure out of.

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A female reader, tennisstar88 United States +, writes (10 November 2010):

tennisstar88 agony auntI'm a spitter..No I'm not a quitter because I still give blow jobs.

Personally, I don't like the consistency, that warm taste, (not to mention I'm a picky eater) and some men's spunk have a nasty taste. As for the swallowers, I've heard one woman tell me it was a good source of protein. Don't know how true that is, I'm thinking it's something the FDA may have to look at, lol.

Oral sex if a given for foreplay, it's about give and take. Anal sex in my opinion is incredibly painful. It's an exit, not an entrance. Now, there are women who get off on anal sex, I don't know too many though. Sexual intercourse, I believe is impertinent in a healthy, stable relationship. There's exceptions such as your minors, and some immature teens who are of legal consent. I assume we're all adults here...My fav position would have to be doggy style, I suppose it's more bed rocking, or I like missionary when my husband puts my ankles on his shoulders, that causing a wonderful orgasm.

In general for ladies, I say whatever position that they can achieve an orgasm is their favorite.

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A female reader, MsVick United States +, writes (10 November 2010):

MsVick agony auntI can only speak for myself as everyone is a unique individual, no two women are alike. I don't swallow, I hate the taste and consistency of it. I spit it out on his stomach, let him deal with the mess.

What kind of sex do I like? The kind where I am in charge, I love to grab a man by the hair and make him do my bidding. Yes I am the rare Dominant female and into BDSM. I will spank him, humiliate him, flog him, slap him and rock his world. So most vanilla guys would consider me too "wild" then again maybe not ;-)

Good luck.

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A female reader, Madalo 1 Malawi +, writes (10 November 2010):

Mmhm. If every woman was to answer, you would get different answers indeed. I dont like the taste of semen, but i swallow it anyway because i love my bf, he treats me like a queen, and he gives me oral without hesitation and makes me cum. My favourite type of sex is oral. It feels so sweet and i always cum. I never cum from vaginal sex. Never tried anal sex but im not interested coz i hear it hurts, and all kinds of negative things.

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A male reader, PM Canada +, writes (10 November 2010):

PM agony auntFrom my own experiences:

Women who have swallowed have told me that they do it either because I like it when they do or because they simply like the taste or the feeling that they get from doing it.

I've not heard too many women loving anal sex. It seems to be a smaller number who truly enjoy it while others are willing to do it because the men they're with like it. Among the women that I've been with, I haven't really seen a preference between oral or vaginal sex. From studies that I've read, many women apparently enjoy oral sex more as they have a difficult time having orgasms through intercourse but isn't something that matches my experiences so I personally take it with a grain of salt.

In terms of sexual positions, it depends on the woman and the type of sexual experience that she's looking for. Some women like the feeling of being ravished and prefer positions where they're in submissive postures - their focus is usually on both physical and psychological pleasure - while other women focus more on physical pleasure over the psychological and prefer positions that stimulate the more sensitive parts of the vagina. In either case, experimentation to figure out what works for the particular woman is key.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States + , writes (10 November 2010):

Tisha-1 agony auntOh, forgot to mention that some women have sensitive gag reflexes, which will influence their decision to swallow or not. I know one who can't brush her back teeth without gagging, every single day. I feel sorry for her dentist.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States + , writes (10 November 2010):

Tisha-1 agony auntHave you ever tasted semen? Ever had it shot down your throat, hot out of the tube? Hm. It's an acquired taste, just like, say, oysters or snails. Individual women will like different things.

As for the next question, again, individual tastes will dictace preference. Sometimes one thing will be more appealing than another. I doubt, however, that many women would prefer anal sex to the others listed. The anus isn't particularly well designed for penetration, it's designed to expel feces.

I guess the answer to your question is that most women would prefer the position that gives them the most pleasure, at the time. And that may change depending on mood and arousal levels and time of month and overall health.

Are you stuck in some kind of argument with your wife?

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (10 November 2010):

dirtball agony auntI'm not a woman, but I know what they'll tell you. There is NO ANSWER to this question. Everyone is different and have different preferences. I'm sure you'll have answers all over the board. Good luck.

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