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Our parents don't know about each other yet, what excuse can we use for him to come and visit me?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family, Gay relationships, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 July 2012) 6 Answers - (Newest, 11 July 2012)
A male United States age 26-29, *iguy12345 writes:

I finally got a good boyfriend but the problem is he lives 1 state away. We need an excuse for him to come down when he gets his licence to be with me on the weekends and a place to stay. Our parents dont know about us yet so it kind of complicated

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A male reader, I love TDG United States +, writes (11 July 2012):

I love TDG agony auntThat's a very dishonest and untrustworthy move. You should definatly tell your parents about your relationship before bringing him into your family's home. They WILL find out if you hide it. Parents have a keen eye on such things.

You'd lose your parents trust if they found out that you were lieing to them about your "friend" not being just a friend. The fact they've never even met this person is another big thing, trust me, it would be much less painful to find out you're hiding a relationship with a person your parents know well than some stranger they've never met staying at their home.

Definatly tell them, I'm sure they'll be okay with it.

If you choose not to tell them, just have him over for the day and "lose track of time", then tell your mom that he gets nervous of driving in the dark and he'll leave in the morning.

Good luck, I hope you make the right choice with this.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (11 July 2012):

Honeypie agony auntWhy keep the relationship a secret? Why lie?

Talk to your parents and honestly, respect their wishes.

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A female reader, wildrose Nigeria +, writes (10 July 2012):

wildrose agony auntDo your parents knows that you are gay?you should 1st let them know of your sexuality before thinking of bringing your boyfriend coz

he might be a total strainger to them and have you met him before wantint to have him in your home you should first know everything about him in other not to be dumbed someday best of luck

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (10 July 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntwhy would you need an excuse?

why is it complicated?

why are you keeping it from your parents?

at 16/17 most kids are dating and permitted to date

if you have a guest room he could stay there... would it be different if he was a girl?

you go to mom and dad and tell them you met a boy online (if you have not met him in real life then that is an issue)

and you want to meet him and spend time together but don't want to sneak around can he come visit at the house?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2012):

I can't imagine your parents letting someone they've never met stay at your home. I've been with my boyfriend a year and a half and he lives near me and my mum still doesn't let him stay the night. However, if you really want him to come down can't you both save some money and he can stay in a B&B or some place like that?

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A female reader, IamJess United Kingdom +, writes (10 July 2012):

IamJess agony auntSay your really good friends?

You should be allowed to tell your parents anything whether their reaction, and when you do tell them they should be happy for you, as long as he's a good guy there's nothing wrong with that, and its not like your the one travelling distances to be with him, its safe.

I don't think its complicated, I think you should just tell them your together and he's gonna come over to visit when he can, and they should be cool and should want to meet him, don't be afraid, got to do it sooner or later, I'm sure they'd want the truth rather then to know he's been visiting you've been secretly together and they don't know what you could of both been up to.

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