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*aisy
writes: I dated this guy for 4 weeks, but we broke up because he wanted sex, and at the time I didn't believe in sex before marriage. Now, a couple of months later, I want to have sex and be in a relationship with him. I hinted at this in a text message to him, but he wasn't getting it (saying I would seriously consider it). How can I be sure hes not using me for sex if I tell him I've changed my mind? and won't I just ruin the thrill of the chase if I do, cause he knows he can get it? I badly want this guy, please help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2005): Hello.This may sound a little harsh but I need to be honest with you. If you were only going out for for weeks and he was willing to finish it with you because you weren`t ready to have sex with him then doesn`t that answer your question for you in a way?If you were to tell him that you have changed your mind about it and it happened and than he finished with you again anyway how would that feel even worse believe me. You can`t be sure he isn`t just using you for sex if that was his origional intent after just four weeks together.If he really wants you, the whole person, feelings and all, then surely he would wait until you were really ready.Just one more thing though; did you change your mind to keep him or is it really and honestly what you want deep down? I think you need to really make sure of how you feel first. It could be infatuation with this guy; after all it was only four weeks into a relationship for you both. Love is something which takes time to build and establish between people.I hope this helps you. Take care,think carefully and make sure of your true feelings first.
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