A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:well today i started school. In all of my classes none of my friends were there. I don't have any friends in my classes. Now i'm all left alone with no one to talk to. Everyone seems to have their own friends. The students in all of my classes don't seem that they want to talk to me or get to know me. Also I'm worried that when it comes to group projects or pairs no one would want to be my partner. What should I do? I'm also worried that if I talk to some of the students in my class they think that i'm wierd. Or in their heads they might be saying why is this person talking to me? I'm a senior, so this is my last year of highschool. I'm also afraid of talking in front of the class and doing oral presentations because the students may laugh at me or gossip about me. this has happened before. I felt very uncomfortable. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Teenage-Rebel  +, writes (19 August 2008):
 Its difficult when your put into classes where you don't know anyone. That is something ive learned.
Try talking to someone in your classes even if it is " hi how are you?"
Try to stay optimistic. See if anyone in the class has simaler intrests as you.
When it comes to class presentations it may be nervous but it has to be done. Try pretending no one is there or look at the wall at the back of the class if you can help it.
Try to stay optimistic and good luck x
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2008): Well they say while in Rome do as the Romans did.
So now you are in classes that allow you to make new friends.
To share with your other friends what your classes are like.
Your big problem is your self.
Lack of confidence, who do you compete with in class?
You!
You are in school to learn knowledge which will help you deal with the big picture that you will soon be responsible for.
Your life!
As long as you do the best you can that is all any one can hope for.
Those who laugh at others mistakes are small people of little understanding, they would best laugh at themselves since this is what they worry about and so are releaved when someone else shows they are not perfect.
When you worry more about what people will think of you or talk about you then you are giving them control over your life, they call this peer pressure and it really is a waste of your time.
You only have so much in your life and so little of it envolves school. You never really stop learning and if you are human then you also know that you will fail a lot since we humans are not perfect, but we do learn if we are smart from our failures.
So if no group will do a project with you then show them all that you can do it better and alone and they will suddenly all want you in their groups.
Afraid of public speaking is very common and I have never liked it ether but it is something that needs to be done.
Anything worth doing is often harder to do then things that are not, so when you speak you need to remember you are trying to give information out to help others.
I realize it will be hard but I have found that when I do speaches it is with the intent of providing others with information and the knowledge of what I did right or wrong is there for me to learn from to improve me.
If my speach improves someone who is listening then there is a bonus but for those who do not "get it" and wish only to say how worthless it was I know that many people need to put others down in order to feel better about themselves.
You should not fear these people you should pity them for they will never understand life and will live badly.
When you speak it is to give and to learn and to better yourself, you need to do this for you.
That is what school is about..... learning.
The social aspects are secondary and are also about being human, when those who laugh at you don't understand that they should be laughing with you it is their loss not yours.
Gossip is always defeated by the truth and once the truth is out gossip looks very petty are is for those of weak minds and broken spirits.
You can only hope that people will someday grow up and realize this and perhaps then the world will change for the better again.
With over 6 billion humans on this planet you can never be alone unless you want to be.
With bilions more in the past who have lived and died you can be sure that you are not alone in what you think and or feel at any given time during your life.
As a single individual human you are special in that you are one of a kind but the feeling, the emotions, the life experinances and knowledge you share with everyone else here on earth.
You have a really really big family and as such is the case with all families there are some good memeber and not so good ones, some smart ones and some less then so, some of all types.
The choice is for you to have fun, live life to the best you can, learn as much for your own benifit and by doing so you will enhance others around you, and don't worry about the little things all the time.
You are young so enjoy it while it lasts and leave the stress behind, it really isn't good for anyone to have to much stress.
So be yourself and be happy for you.
Let other people worry about themselves you have enough too do for you right now.
Once you take care of you, you will be able to help others see the light.
But for now just smile at their lack of understanding and they will wonder why you are smiling and this will drive them crazy with unknown resolve.
It will give you back control of your life which is where it should be.
Be careful not to give others to much power over you.
Often people abuse these powers.
More often they don't do what is good for you.
So as far as you are concerned, who is more important then you?
No one.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (19 August 2008):
Aww..don't feel this way! I think you may have a case of inferiority complex. It's the first day of class...you'll make friends and have people to talk to after a little while! Try going to college and having to do things in groups or pairs and not knowing a single person, now that sucks! Anyway, you'll be fine. They aren't thinking ANY of those things. You don't have to go and initiate conversation, but sometimes it will just happen. Don't worry so much and don't worry what other people think of you.
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