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female
,
anonymous
writes: I am so utterly broken. My boyfriend of 8 months, who I loved (and still do) more than just about anything, called me 3 weeks back on my first day at uni and broke up with me. No reasons or anything.How do I begin to get over him? I'm an emotional wreck trying to make friends.
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female
reader, dear  +, writes (26 May 2008):
i can relate to you so much, i recently got "dumped" by my boyfriend after 2 years. All week he had been distant from me and at the end of the week by much force from myself he ended it. no reason no nothing. So i left it a few days and just called him to ask what had i done wrong, and he still couldnt give me a good enough reason. He said that he wanted to be on his own and didnt see us going much further and that we are to different.
Yeah im really upset and ive cried for a few days and let it all out. By now im focusing on myself, going to the gym, seeing my friends and getting on with my studies.
think of it this way, if hes able to do that to you, hes obviosuly not the guy for you, thats what i think :)
hope ive helped!
A
reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (24 October 2005):
 I don't know what 'Pops' is on about below in terms of education but I think he is just trying to assume a reason (more than likely the wrong one, we cannot assume on the basis of what you have said and what little you know) as to why your boyfriend broke up with you. It certainly isn't your loss either-it is your gain.
I know you are heartbroken but it is indeed better that you know now than later as the pain would surely be worse. The fact that he didn't give you a reason illustrates him to be a disrespectful, uncaring and gutless individual.
Give yourself time to get over this but realise that you have had a lucky escape if he couldn't even be bothered to explain to you to allow you closure over this; it was a very heartless thing to do.
You can do better-much better. You will, if you try your very best to put this behind you. I don't know if you are staying at uni but try to muster up your strength, include yourself in activities and make new friends. It is possible despite your loss.
You will get over this but it does take time and it does hurt very much. Allow yourself that time to heal but try to live your life and grasp as much enjoyment as you possibly can.
I wish you well.
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A
reader, pops +, writes (24 October 2005):
Is he attending, or has he attended the University and earned a degree? If not, he is part of that group of men who fear dating and marrying a woman who is better educated than they are. ( I didn't say smarter. I have known some brilliant men and women who did not complete 8th grade in school. They were uneducated by and large, but they were not stupid, and they had genious-like talents in their own right.)He is being narrow minded. Better that you found out now, than after dating him longer, or getting married. I am sorry about your loss, but it was his choice, and it is your loss. YOu will find someone else, and probably someone at the University you now attend.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2005): Surely there must be a reason. He probably found someone else which is what you should do. Talk to your friends, I'm sure they will help you through this.
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A
male
reader, Ellis Mac +, writes (24 October 2005):
Well it sounds like you have already begun to get over him, for you are grieving. That's the first stage. It must be very hard for you, considering the way your boyfriend broke it off. That's harsh.
Cry until you can cry no more, and then one day you will feel something shift, and you will emerge, a wiser, stronger, and more compassionate person.
In the meantime, know that we are dealt nothing in life that we cannot deal with. Be strong.
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