A
male
age
36-40,
JasonL
writes:I have been in a gay relationship for 18 years(since the age of 16). We are very happy and committed and loyal. 3 years ago, a younger man entered our lives and turned it upside down. We both fell in love with him and fought desperately for it not to happen. 3 years later we are all together still, it wasn't something that was planned, it just happened and progressed. I'm desperate to talk to anyone who is in a "three-way" relationship as there appears to be no chat groups or forums for this type of relationship.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2008): Hi,I have been in a three way gay relatinship for 6yrs now. Yes at times it's not easy, but if you all want it and feel like your wanted there, then work for it. If your the third that came into the relationship, it can take a very long time NOT to feel like the third, and yes outside comments and what others think should not interfere with what YOU want, I know its hard at times, and yes some outsiders would just think its all about sex but this is about you and not the outsiders. Its natural for my partners to talk about things together and then just happen to mention it to me, it can hurt but they have been togeter for 6 yrs. before I came along so you have to give them some slack, I still let them know when I feel a bit hurt or upset etc..... They have a past and they have old friends that dont exactly include me in some things or take the relationship seriously, but after 6 yrs some are getting it LOL. anyway, take it easy, and make sure you dont let some of the things get to you. Your there for you and them and no one else. The end story is, if your happy.. then you should be there.my opinion anyway!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2007): There is a good documentary "Three of Hearts: A Postmodern Family" that chronicles the long-term union and eventual breakup of a three-way relationship. I have not seen it yet, but it appears that a relationship of this kind can be strong, but our human nature can always take over.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2007): Hi,Jealousy is tearing our relationship apart because it is not a balanced relationship. I, the female, have a girlfriend and we live in her husband's house with his open permission, but not open acceptance. Although he was told the nature of our relationship, he still interjects his emotional authority and she allows his, why...because is it not blanaced and we are in his house. So I will lost out because I can't take the emotional authority in my own relationship in her husband's house. Too bad for me. So, get a balanced, understanding, open honest communication and don't just hear what one says, but take note at how one really feels and respect those feelings, whether you lose or win. Respect is the ultimate goal.
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A
male
reader, JasonL +, writes (1 March 2007):
JasonL is verified as being by the original poster of the questionComplicated. But it gets easier over time. Nothing prepares you for it, it just happens. We are very happy, but there is also the matter of distance between us. Early on, emotions, jealousy were really destructive, honesty was important. Trust was the most important issue and it was hard working at it. I have 2 lovers, 2 soul mates and get double of everything! My first partner of 18 years, we had issue over it and fought hard not to fall for this person, but over time you cant deny your feelings. We were very strong and secure and let this person share our life. He in returns has equal love and respect completely and the balance is just right, but its been hard working getting here. I suppose my first relationship required a lot of hard work and effort for it to last 18 yrs, so we both realise that more hard work is needed to see our new addition works well with us both. God we have had ups and downs and jealousy has nearly destroyed us, but when sorted, the rewards are double. Hope this gives you a little insight.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2007): Can you give more details about this relationship? I'm curious...how does it work?
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