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female
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anonymous
writes: I am a mother with a 14-year-old son and a 19-year-old daughter.He seems to have a worrying obsession with emergencies and said to me the other day "Emergencies are funny. As long as no-one is killed or seriously hurt, then an emergency is funny."He has been in trouble at school for causing various 'emergencies' and then blaming them on other people.I don't know why he does this as I give him attention and love.What do I do about his obsession with emergencies??Thanks,Caroline Reply to this Question
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reader, schlottjl  +, writes (17 August 2005):
 As well as the above advice, also try to use behavior modification.
Catch him acting correctly and give him the attention you know he loves even if he is barely acting good. When he brings up emergencies. Look at him with the "look" mixed with a bit of pathetic. Put him in his room and give it no other attention until later when he is acting in any non-emergency way.
Consider that if you are having any family or marital problems, he may be sounding an alarm of another kind. If he is fearful of the home environs and is unsure of the future, he is likely taking the role of alarm sounder. In his mind, he does the family a service by acting up so that you all can forget your worries and focus away from what he fears might happen and instead focus on a non-emergency emergency. He is a smart kid if you think about it that way. He is also sweet and terrified.
Get some help for the family. Don't be afraid of the implications. Almost every family could benefit. Consider that he is at least not going for bodily harm yet. I know and love many people who lost their life sounding the alarm. Get on top of it while it is still easy. (and kind of funny if you hold the right attitude. Laugh at your self to survive but never let the kids see it. A sense of humor is sometimes the sign that you are all back on track.)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2005): I should mention that the 'emergencies' aren't hoax ones, the school told me that this morning.
Caroline
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (17 August 2005):
 Your son may just think he's being mischievious, but fake emergencies cost thousands - sometimes tens of thousands - of dollars and risk peoples' lives. Does he realise that?
What happens if the emergency services are looking for a hoax bomb at your son's school, or trying to find a "missing" baby and in the meantime, someone is genuinely in need? The very resources that could save someone's life are wasted on your son's prank. Ask him how he'd feel if his best friend died in a car wreck because the police were elsewhere, wasting time on a hoax that he invented?
As his mother, you need to put a stop to this at once. Part of my job is working with emergency services in my country, and I can tell you for a fact that hoaxes and pranks can tie up emergency personnel for hours and prevent them from being able to reach someone who might be dying from poisoning, hurting kids, trapped in a burning vehicle, or bleeding, or suffering from any of a thousand types of injuries.
Talk to your son today and tell him that if you ever find out that he's hoaxing the emergency services, that you'll allow the full force of the law to descend on him. Maybe that will persuade him that he's actually causing trouble in your community. Seriously, Caroline, your son could be looking at time in Juvenile detention, or a whopping great fine. In my country, the fine is $50,000 PER INCIDENT for hoaxing the Police.
Few things make me more irate than wilful, malicious pranks that risk peoples' safety. You should let your son know that these things are in no way "funny", and that he could be responsible for people's deaths by wasting the time of police and fire personnel.
Incidentally, as his legal guardian, his behaviour is still your responsibility, so you should be doing your utmost to prevent his "fun", unless you fancy the Police visiting your home and arresting your son.
There's still time to impress on him how serious this matter is, so I hope that you'll try.
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female
reader, 81605slygurl +, writes (17 August 2005):
Maybe it's a cry for help and a costly one at that! I think it also may be a phase, but talk to him and tell him your problem. Maybe he'll mature, if not, there's always boot camp!! Jk, also you could make sure that you and him always communicate. Also, make sure he deosn't have any bad friends and look out for him at school. Is he getting the grades he needs to get? I'm assuming he's in HIgh school already, but boys will be immature, so I say you need to DISCIPLINE him. It's not too late. He's still a teen.
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