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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hi im 14 an my parents won't let me hav a boyfriend, i don't want one jus for the sake of it but i think they r bein a bit over protective. i've had 2 but they caught me n made me break it off. wateva im doin im always wary of wat they think i no they dnt trust me still n i dnt no wen they will. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, cd206  +, writes (14 January 2007):
 I totally agree with one of the above people who said trust is earned. I think the reason your parents won't let you have a boyfriend is because they're worried about your maturity and welfare. The best way to get round this is to sit down and talk to them. Tell them that you're feeling left out by not being allowed to have a boyfriend and that you want to be friends with boys. Make sure they know that you're not planning to do anything other than kiss them and promise to talk to them if you ever have thoughts of going further. Find out why they have doubts about you having a boyfriend and listen to them maturely without arguing. Whatever their reasons are begin your counter argument with "Yes, I can understand your point of view but I feel..." Agree with them plenty and show them how mature you can be and theyre more likely to think you're ready for a boyfriend. Hope this helps.
CD
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2007): Trust is earned. Doubt however, will always be there, even if they trust you.
I think it's well noted that they are protective of your welfare at your ripening age of 14. I mean, I would definitely watch out for my daughter if she got into high school and is probably being macked on my boys or girls around her age. In fact, though I wouldn't restrict her from dating, I wouldn't exactly be all out accepting of it either.
Eg: it took my parents pass high school and well into my 20's to gain near-absolute trust towards me. Honestly, most parents I've known don't absolutely trust their children - if they do, that wouldn't actually be a good thing. How so? Some doubt is always healthy. It means they care.
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female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (13 January 2007):
 it seems to me their just worried and trying to protect you.. best thing to do is to assure them you wont do anthing unlawful and that you feel youre mature enough to have a boyfriend..if theirs someone you like take him to youre home talk awhile, then ask youre parents opinion on him.. decieving youre parents are only going to make them trust you less.. with my parents they were okay with me having boyfriends but that because they said they trusted me to do the right thing and not to be stupid.. im not saying that you are but im just saying thats how my parents thought so maybe theirs something on youre parents mind aks them discuss it with them try to approach it maturely.. thats my opinion hope it helps xxx A
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female
reader, heartxbrokenxgurl  +, writes (13 January 2007):
 that suckz i mean im 13 n i have had alot of boyfriends my parents dont care my 1st boyfriend was in kg i would say ur parents dont want u to go off n have sex which shuld sit down with them n say y cant u trust me to have a boyfriend get their side of the story n then confence them ur ready n wont do anything that they dont want u to do
good luck
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